i think i have cancer and dont think i have much longer left. i have found the love of my life and it hurts so much. i love her with all my heart, and just found a job and i owe my mom 4,000 dollars. i feel so selfish and ashamed that i havent told anyone. i just dont know how i can tell someone. i mean im pretty sure im going to die. and i dont know if i could take it, all the people i know and love knowing im going to be gone. i think about this every single day.