Frustrated In Fernie

Well I've been up for hours looking for information on adults with CP and I'm still on this site so I think its time to tell my story. I was born in 77' in a small town in BC Canada. I have a twin and I was the first born. due to a lack of oxygen I have CP and my sister does not. Even though I have a twin, I am still very lonely. She had no complications, and is therefore normal. Our parents were kids themselves and did nothing to improve my situation. and never even discussed what I had. They divorced when I was very young, and my sister and I were passed around to family members. It was not until I was an adult that I even understood what I had. At this time I also found out that many of my issues could have been made easier with a few simple surgeries. And the resentment and lonliness began to grow. Growing up was hard enough with the teasing and being left out of so many things, combined with the fact that my sister lived a normal life and enjoyed all the activites of childhood and beyond.
I have never had the support I have truley needed, and as a teen when a shown the smallest bit of love I jumped in full force, so suprised that anyone could possibly love me. I spent 10 years of my life doing everything I could to make this man happy, neglecting the things I needed in the process. And now it has all been done for nothing, as he has moved on. I happily at least have my beautiful and completly healthy daughter And now i am feeling the affects of age along with my cp and neglect. And with an even lower self worth then I had before, I have remarried, someone very much the opposite of my ex, or so i thought, although he cares for my needs, he almost seems happier that i am becoming more unhealthy, and fragile. And is rather discouraging on my trying to impove things. I need the encougement that I can make the changes needed to become as healthy as my restrictions allow. I wonder, is it possible as an adult with CP to learn to ice skate, ski or some other sport. I need to start trying to find an active life styly for my 5yr old before she developes an unhealthy life, and i am finding because I cant do these things she says she is unable. Does anyone know of resorces in the Kootenys of BC?
Cleocatra Cleocatra
31-35, F
3 Responses Jan 2, 2013

I am 36 and i have cerebral palsy. All my life I tried to be as normal as possible. I could walk albiet with a very noticable limp and as such my family never treated me as disabled. I went to college, law school etc. I even got married. But the truth is, nothing I have ever done made me feel normal.

My husband is kind and tolerates a lot. But i feel guilty that he married me. Shortly into my thirties I developed chronic pain that I had never experienced before. It took away our sex life and any chance of having kids. Yet he stays. Sometimes I wish he would leave so he could have the normal life he deserves. Then I realize how alone I would be. My family never understood the difficulties of my life and now completely disregard the physical toll cp has taken on my life. They won't even acknowledge my pain or the fact that I am slowly losing function. I shutter to think what my forties will bring.

He loves you! When he married you in married you "in sickness and in health". Don't feel guilty! I don't understand your family's attitude though I must say.

I agree that things are definetly getting more difficult as we age. But even though I have also have tried to live a "normal" life. I have come to the realization that I now have to seek help for many of the things that are difficult. I am starting to look for local organizations that are there for the disabled and use them in any way that I can..

I'm also a twin, my twin is also fine...although I was second born, and also a single mother! I certainly didn't feel bitter towards my twin, or my other siblings growing up. I think it's lovely you married again, as yes, people can be shallow, but, there are also a lot of people who aren't.

I play wheelchair basketball and do track racing. I take my little boy to rugby and he also comes to track with me and joins in with the able-bodied children's running club.

I'm in the UK but I know this sort of thing exists in the US.

Having a disability can be challenging, but we must accept what's happened and make the best of it after all life is too short to waste.

there are not a lot of them around i am sad to say

the sports part there are many places that do deal with those issues and special gear so you can also take part

please feel free if you want to talk to write while i do not have CP i have worked with it a lot of my life even to this day i deal with the 2 that live with me and aging with cp but i try to make sure they have a life also
but i am in oregon i am not sure how far you are in BC