everything was fine until 5th grade. i was wearing shorts at a theme park. i was running down a hill in front of my sister and her boyfriend (who i had a big ol' silly crush on), when i heard "oh my god *****, your right leg is so much smaller than the other!" *laugh laugh*says sister. i stopped. i was very confused. i'd never notice my calves were two very visible different sizes. the whole rest of the day, i felt like the entire world was looking and laughing. i couldn't look at anyone any more. that memory stuck like super glue. i still don't have the guts to throw on a cute dress or a pair of shorts. i should feel blessed since it could be worse but..i don't want this curse called cp. it makes simple tasks so difficult. people pity you daily. then i pity myself. cp hurts. what lesson are we supposed to learn? to struggle? knowing i can't get any medical help? even being denied the medical card so i can see a therapist only because i work a full time job and have no children?? just because i work full time does not make me finacially stable. i don't have extra money lying around!! i pay bills!! c'mon!! if i didn't at least have the internet, i dunno what i'd do.