I Am Proud Of Myself

i am brave! ^_^

when i first cut ties with my brother and his wife, my family made a huge deal out of it. Especially after he went around telling everyone lies, making himself out to be the "victim" and me the villain. but i stood my ground.

i was in a position in where alot of people were against me because of my decision. my socipathic brother can be very convincing. Some family members took full advantage of my situation (having everyone critisize me) that they showed me their true colors. they treated me badly. for no reason. they would disrespect me and give me the cold shoulder. So! a few weeks ago i excluded 3 more people whom had been extremely disrespectful to me. calling me a les because i have no kids and am not married. acting like i have done something wrong when i truely hadn't they were the ones who had offended me. it was 3 of my cousins whom i deleted and blocked on fb.

i was scared. i thought "now everyone is going to get even more mad at me and demand to know why". but to my surprise no one said anything. no one questioned me about what i had done. i had also put two more family members in their place for taking cheap shots at me. these two i decided to give another chance and i guess that's why i didn't care to indirectly put them in their place. i guess my bark scared them. they had gotten so use to me staying quiet after they would insinuate bad things about me right to my face, and are completely use to bad mouthing me behind my back that i guess it took them by complete surprise that i defended myself and was ready to go to war in other words.

i feel much better now. i feel like i am moving tours a new life. all it took was for me to be brave and stand up for myself.

another reason why i think they have backed off is because i (to avoid any more rumors about me being a LES) Made up a fake "boyfriend".

on my family fb (i have two fb) i hardly ever put up pics so it doesn't look suspicious that i don't have any pictures of "us" together.

(never been a fan of taking pics of myself just for compliments anyways)

anyways i had to lie and tell my narcissistic mother and everyone else that i do have a boyfriend.

well my mother has never wanted to conversate with me so i just kept leaving the house whenever she would come home from her job. and i wouldn't come back till she was asleep. so when she asked where had i been i lied and said in my boyfriend's house. knowing very well she has never wanted to meet any of my boyfriends in the past i wasn't surprised as soon as she gave me a dirty look and walked away no longer wanting to hear anything about my "boyfriend" lol

also when my older sister (my narcissistic mother's enabler) would call me to get me to confide in her my secrets so she could go and tell my mother my business (i use to trust her but she has betrayed me several times and never apologised) (she really thinks i am dumb enough to continue on trusting her lol) i would tell her only what i wanted her to spread around. i lied to her too about my "great boyfriend" hahaha

so now my family thinks i have a boyfriend and surprisingly they have stopped bullying me with mean spirited comments tours me on fb, over the phone, ect.

plus with my actions of deleting those family members who insist on bullying me, i've really shown them that if they don't respect me then they won't be a part of my life. the fact that i haven't spoken to my brother in four years now has helped me in a way to get respect from those who prefer to spit in my face to feel better about their pathetic selves. now they know i am not afraid of being alone (i've been alone all along) they know i don't need them.

when i leave my house i go and walk for hours! i ride the bus back and forth or the train. sometimes i'll just go inside a mall when it's really cold that i can't walk anymore or i am really tired of walking. it's really sad that i can't be in my own home because they will attack me. so i have to keep this charade up just to get them off my back. it's crazy how when they think that i have a man on my side who loves me and will protect me my entire family backs off like the cowards that they are.

only that man doesn't exist.

but i am still proud of myself because i was able to outsmart them;)
poker face:p
veronica4ever veronica4ever
26-30, F
1 Response Jan 23, 2013

OMG ! I think your my lost twin !
I have done the same, I also have a narcissistic mother that I have avoided and managed to plan moving out of that house where I never felt home ! lies did work !

well hello sister;)