No More Of You

Silly me, oh, I thought it could last, but I was oh so very long. Sometimes I wonder how I didn't see it sooner.

I had hope. Hope that it might change. Hope that maybe, just maybe, all I'd worked for before wouldn't just backfire in a single moment - and for no reason too. But, as always, hope fails me, and brings me to the despair of disappointment.

I still don't know what went wrong, and as much as I try to understand it, I can't wrap my head around it. You just stopped talking to me, and you wouldn't tell me what's wrong. Did I do something wrong? Did you do something wrong? Why did you lie to me? Come on, I'm not stupid. Parents my ***, why the hell would they care whether or not you saw me. I don't get it. I don't get why you felt the need to lie. If you just told me what was wrong, maybe we could fix it. Or maybe we'd just accept it and end it peacefully. I told you that the single most thing that hurt me was your hiding from me, that every other fault from either side mattered nothing in comparison to that... but no, you left me hanging.

And I still can't understand.

But I guess it doesn't matter anymore. I'm not sure what you were trying to accomplish, but if you wanted me to hate you, well, you've done very well. I don't want to see you anymore. Ever. I knew you weren't the brightest of the bunch, but I had hope that somewhere in your heart you would love me enough to not hurt me so badly, and that somewhere in your mind something would click and allow you to go somewhere with your life. And yet you betrayed me... you turned out to be a complete ******* about it all too. I never want to deal with you again, and honestly, my comfort is knowing that you'll suffer without me. Let's face it, I was all you had, we, my friends, all you had, and you gave it up... and no one knows for what. But we can see through your fake happiness, all of us, and we know well that you will deeply regret what you've done to me - and I won't even have to do a thing to make you feel that way. The best part? It matters not to me anymore.

You thought that my friends would comfort you? Haha, very funny, dipshit. After the **** you tried to pull do you really think they'd turn against me and be on your side? Come on, get real.

In any case, I'm glad it happened like this, and I guess that's another thing I've changed my mind about. At first I wished for a more peaceful resolution... but now I realize the glory in a messy one. I'll get my revenge without even trying. Better yet, I won't miss you. I've suffered thinking and worrying about you for long enough, and the anger that you brought out in me cured me of that. I have no reason to love you, or even like you, and I never will again.

I've changed my mind; forgiveness is out of the question this time.
BrownEyedMystery BrownEyedMystery
Nov 28, 2012