Who Knows

I met a guy 3 years ago. Things were complicated at 1st as he was just going through a divorce. His ex wife found out about us and stopped him from seeing his children. I offered to walk away to make things easier didn't want to be the one at blame for these children not seeing there Dad. He told me I was being silly and that she had to let him move on. He fought to see them and I stood by him and supported him through all the difficult times and he finally won the right to see them.
I didnt get involved in that side of his life kept our life and the kids life seperate he would have them over the weekend and I would be with him during the week. Things were great everything was nice. He would make me cry with laughter. One and a half years into the relationship he wanted me to meet his children he had a girl aged 12 and a little boy aged 4. I was so nervous about meeting them but I needn't have worried they were brilliant we got on fantastic. From then on every weekend we spent together as a "family" we would watch movies on Saturday nights and have days out on Sundays. Everything was brilliant. We went for long walks, We took trips to the beach. We went to the amusement park. We went to museums. All week we looked forward to our weekends with the kids. By this time he had moved in and we had decorated the spare room for the kids. I used to have his bath ready for when he got in and whilst he was in the bath I would sort out some dinner so we had more time to relax with each other. Then on the weekend we would all be together it was really fun

In November it all ended ... I found out he  had been texting and meeting up with other women when he told me he had been working. I approached him about it and he said that it was harmless fun. I asked to look at his phone and he showed me the messages that were being sent. It wasn't harmless fun he was leading these women on making them believe he was single, playing games. How can it be harmless fun when peoples emotions are involved?? 
After this we separated. I wouldn't be able to trust him again and he said he would only end up hurting me.
I felt crushed. I hadn't just lost him I had lost my family. Him and those 2 kids had been my world and my house felt so empty and sad.  At the end of November it was little boys birthday. His Nanny did him a birthday party. His Dad called and asked me to be there. We had already brought his birthday present while we were together. I went down and celebrated his birthday I couldn't just walk away. I didn't see them again until Christmas eve. Took the kids Christmas presents round and spent a couple of hours with them it was lovely they were so excited to see me after not seeing me for a month. That was the last time I saw them :(

My Nan passed away on Friday and my ex called on Saturday he spent an hour on half on the phone to me. I was just talking about my Nan and he was telling me how he is sorry for my loss and that he will always be around for me.
Its nice to know that he is still thinking about me and its nice to know he still cares. Its not so nice that it brings up the question of why when everything was so great did he have to ruin it?? Why did he feel the need to be texting these other women?? He's told me since we split that he still loves me and he's told me that I was the best thing to happen to him. He said he was texting these women as an ego boost but I told him everyday how special he was and how much I loved him and how handsome he is why did he need an ego boost??.. Why would he do this?? Non of it makes sense to me and I guess I'm always going to be asking these one of life's unsolved mysteries. 
MeliB87 MeliB87
22-25, F
3 Responses Jan 18, 2012

sometimes it's worth sticking with him and the kids, even if he's a jerk about some things in life. life is about the whole, and some rotten bits can be tolerated. but it's up to you, and you seem to know what you have to do. still, this is very sad, and i feel badly for your complications. good luck.

I realise that now ... Somethings just aren't meant to be :) x

His reasons for cheating on you are irrelevant.