A Friend With Benefits..

A few months ago, I was introduced to this guy by a mutual friend. We connected on FaceBook and I really needed some friend in the area. I had just moved there. I didn;t even think we would actually meet. But then we did. The night before we firt met, we spent the whole night txting. We talked about past experiences and what we were looking for from each other. This set up was not intended to be a romantic one. And from the beginning, he said he was looking for a friend with benefits that may lead to something more. This was good for me, as I knew that I was going back home a month later. So we started hooking up. And it was a lo of fun. And I was more than willing to follow the rules. Very early on. he broke them ALL. He would call me sweety and baby and this confued the hell out of me. Becaue he would also ask me if I missed him. And I didn't really. But I would play along cause I liked the sex. I thought it was going to last a month. And then he surprised me by telling me, he was also going home fore the holidays. So we continued our relationship back home. A whole new playing field. He asked me to go watch a game with him, and we started seeing eachother ALL the time. I was practically living in his apartment. And we held hands and cuddled and even hung out w/out sex. When I had my period, he insisted I come over. We pent the week together with out having sex. The very sweet messages continued. And then he told me he was going back in  3 weeks. I started to develop feelings for the guy. Sex will do that to you, even when you know you could never be erious about them. So I decided to just end things. Especially since I was staying and he was leaving. But being the typical girl that I am, I regretted it. And when he insisted on staying friends, I obliged. A week after I "dumped" him, we were back in the sack. This time around, I thought things would be better. We introduced "booty call" to our vocabulary and I was hoping this would help set some boundries. But things are back to the way they were. Last night he txted me "I hope you're sleeping well baby, muahh, sweet dreams." And today instead of having txt convos, he called me up 3 times through out the day. And we never talked on the phone. So when I "dumped" him, I told hm one of the reasons was because I wanted something more serious ( Ileft out that I didn;t want something serious with him), and when he didn;t say anything, I said, "and you don;t want anything more serious..right?" And he said that he didn;t. So then why is he acting like he's my boyfriend when he doen;t want something more. This is confusing a hell. One of the reasons I went back to the benefits was cause I thought he was going back. Well it turns out, he found a job here and now he's staying. He changed his plans. And now I have to figure out what I want to do. Cause I know that nothing serious will come of this, but I can't help myself. Do you think, it could eventually turn to something serious or do you have any idea what he's really thinking?AAAAAAAHH!!!!!!!! I'm sick of guys!!

BTW, I want to make it clear that this guy told me he wasnt looking for something serious. He's just acting sometimes like he does and sometimes he does things which make me think he doesn;t. The longer I stay with him, the more feelings I develop. And I don't necessarily want anything more serious. I like how things were before he broke the rules. But I still can;t help myself. I'm too much into this. I know I need to end things before I actually get hurt. And as much as I don;t think he would be a good boyfriend for me, I know that if he says thats what he wants (which he won;t), then I will give it to him. Despite the fact that I may not think it;s the best idea.

Danyush Danyush
4 Responses Jun 10, 2009

Can you explain what a friend with Benfits actually is, ive heard it many times but haven't got the true meaning of the phrase, anyone?

I have heard this quote before many times " a friend with benefits " could someone please tell me what it means...thick Englishman lol

Someone you shag but you don't have any emotional attachment to. Or as I call it, "perfect"

You said it yourself and answered your own question. "even when you know you could never be serious about them"

Something is off with this guy, something is wrong. RUN FAR AWAY!!!!!! Obviously this guy has some issues and enjoys toying with your feelings, so cut him off completley, take him 100 percent out of your life. No one deserves to be treated like this.

Yeah I agree, what a d*ucheb*g