My Mother Is Too Much On My Life

i am new here.  but it is good to know there are places where you can go to talk to others where they go through the same tihng.  i have wo parents thath aqve helped me beyond.  but man has it come with a price.  my father is the greatest.  but my mother is another story.  becasue hse has had to help me before in the past, she feels that she has the right to tell me what to do.  she says if i dont like it i need ot move out of state to get away from her.  anyhow. immature!!!!!!!   well i have had my kids as a single parent and i needed a litte help fropm them.  but now i met a great guy and he has been helping me to where my mom does not watch my kids anymore if i need it, i dont need money from her anymore and all of the other things.  well we live on our own andi have my grandmother living with me.  my mother gets paid for it although i do it all for my gma.  she barely started gibing me a little less than a 1/3 for watching her.  and she always says she will take it awa and blah blah.  so i tell her go ahead and i will no longer watch my grandma.  i go to school in the day and she talsk crap about that too.  first she said i was a joke becasue that ment she had to watch my grandma, but nope, my fiance does it.  now he is going to work in the day snd she got so mad becasue she has to do it.  she says her life is too busy for it.  she doesn ot work, my dad hires people to do everything for them at the house and she has my sister and brother clean.  qall she does is shop all week and conciders that a part of her life. 

she got upset at me becasue i did not let her and my dad claim my girls for taxes even though i provide for them, she buys things for them at her house as though they live there so she believes she supports them.  the clothes are never worn cuz they are there maybe every other week for a few hours when i go over.  but that is only one part of what she does.  when i stay the night at her house when it is to late to drive home, if i leave the next day before noon, she starts talking her mess saying i only want to leave so i can sleep, or i can go home and do nothing (when i am at her house i am the one that does the cleaning). my widshield broke and i got it fixed and she did not talk to me for about two days becasue i didnt ask her or my dad to do it.  she tells me about everyday that i need to watch what i eat, and to make sure i shower and wash my kids clothes.  EVEN WHAT TIME TO MAKE DINNER!!!!!  and it goes even more beyond. 

 

i am triyng to make my own life becaue of my upsoming marriage ( i tried doing that on my own too, but she already put deposits for the reception flowers dj and all the other stuff becasue she said if i did a small one that it ment i was doing it to get back at her).  how do you guys deal with it?

 

 

morningr morningr
26-30, F
2 Responses Feb 22, 2010

some one please get a grip of your self I have read about ten stories on this site and none of them compare to my parents y'all need to slap some scence into each other becuz all I'm hearing is you complaining your mamas love you too much they sound like they really care there is a differance between controling and co-dependant for those who don't no what this means it is a kind of or form of OCD they mentally have to check up on you for what ever reason a lot of times there mind will go into hyper dive when u don't pick up and that causes them to call moreif you want them to call less anser the phone

I don't really know what will help. I am 31 and going through the same thing. I finally had to yell at her and stop answering my phone because she calls me everyday (yes, every day) to tell me what she had for breakfast, that shes going to exercise, what my dad is doing, what I am doing, what i should be doing, etc etc). Every time I tell her to back off of me and that she's getting a bit worrisome with the constant prying she acts like she so hurt and I have said the worst thing in the world... *sigh*