Is This Really Something Other People Suffer With? I Thought It Was Just Me.I am 31 year old woman and have spent my whole life beating myself up for not being able to do what everyone else can do. I can't wake up in the morning and I can't go to sleep at a normal time. I really want to believe that this is not my fault. I couldn't believe it when I read about DSPS as it is exactly what I try to live with.
I'm not an insomniac because when I do go to sleep I sleep soundly for eight hours. The problem is that I rarely go to sleep before 4am and have no problem staying awake until 8 or 9am if I'm working on something. So it is not unusal for me to be just waking up at 2 or 3pm.
I have had to ba
When I have gone to the doctor to try find a solution they have just prescribed sleeping pills which made me even worse in the morning or various different anti-depressants. I don't think I actually suffer from depression but I often feel lonely or incredibly guilty and inadequate for always letting employers and co-workers down and the stress of fighting against my natural way of being.
I am now a Art History PhD student because I can work at night and still succeed in something I really love. My brain wakes up at night and I find I make connections and come up with ideas that never occurred to me during the day. When I occasionally have to teach a morning class I just don't go to sleep the night before and I drink lots of coffee. It works much better than trying to force myself out of bed at 6am after less than 3 hours sleep and my brain genuinely does not really work until I've been awake for hours.
I just wish that DSPS was recognized as a real disorder and disability as it is very lonely and I hate having to lie to my family and friends about why I can't function like a normal person.
I would love to hear about how other people deal with this and in particular if you have overcome it and are now a day person and if you feel that you can be creative and at your best from 9 to 5.
hadalittle 31-35 5 Responses 2 Feb 18, 2011