Oh, Where To BeginI guess I'll start with this. I have had dermatillomania since I was fourteen years old, and I'm twenty now. My favorite place to pick is all over my shoulders, and for most of my picking I have been able to keep it contained on my right shoulder. But ever since I started college the picking has progressed completely out of my control making it so the entirety of my arms are covered in scabs basically all the time. Every night I try to clean thoroughly with rubbing alcohol (which I really like the burn of, since it feels like my bumps are getting eradicated, even if that is not the case), and aloe vera, and then try as best as I can to keep my skin hydrated, and although all those methods do seem to help significantly, I just cannot keep up the healing with the picking. I keep picking open new scabs before they even heal, and I do it across every single inch of my body that I can get my fingernails to reach. My favorite tool to use on stubborn picks is a thumbtack.
I've tried going to therapist my junior year of college, but that did nothing. Although I very much liked the woman I was talking to, she had no idea what dermatillomania was, and even pulled out a dictionary to look up the definition while I was sitting there. But its not to any fault of her, but she can't exactly help me if she doesn't know what the problem is! Haha!
At any rate, I stumbled across the site because my picking has been exceptionally worse lately than it ever has been in a long time, and I've noticed that one of my scabs has turned into an infection on my forearm. And of course I began to get extremely nervous because this infection seems unusually bad. So, I've been hosing it down with rubbing alcohol as much as I can. All the while I continually pick at my neck and chest. When I can easily pick at something with one hand, that's when I know that its time to cut my nails down to nubs!
So, I guess my real reason for joining onto this site is because I'd really like to establish a community. Or even just talk to one person who understands what its like to have this problem. I have a very loving boyfriend who helps me out as much as he can, but he doesn't really understands what this is like, and I have no idea as to how I can help him understand. Then, hopefully after I meet some people perhaps we can aide each other in the healing process and eventually overcome this! I'm sick of seeing endless scabs and scars, and of feeling embarrassed to wear tank tops without the security of a sweatshirt or cardigan.
This is by no means my whole story, but I felt that it was an appropriate introduction! I'll most likely add more when its not 4 in the morning and I have more energy and attention to detail =]
IvyEyes 18-21, F 4 Responses 0 Jun 17, 2012