Lips

I have Dermatillomania, and I've been compulsively picking off the skin of my lips for eleven years. I'm 16 and sometimes it's hard going to school and people asking you why you're lips look like that. I've tried everything- vaseline, lip gloss, lipstick, nail polish, hand tied behind my back. My mom even made me sit on my hands at one point. It used to be really bad, to the point where my lips would look bruised; blue and purple. Now they are discolloured and I can't stop. I get anxiety and nervous when I try not to do it, and when I do, it's a huge calming sense of relief.

I've recently decided to quit for a week- see if I can. I've been trying my hardest and haven't done it, except for the exception of a few times for a millisecond when it came naturally and I realized my hands were at my lips.

I don't want to look like this anymore.

I didn't know anybody else had this problem, actually, until today. Everyone always thought I was a freak, and I would always cover it up with lipstick. I've never seen anybody else with lips like mine. But I was getting frustrated with my nervousness while I've been trying to quit, and so I googled it, and found tons of other people asking help about their lip picking; some have been doing it for 20+ years. I don't want that to happen.

Encouragement would be appreciated so much. I'm feeling so antsy and anxious I can't focus. Nobody else understands what this feels like, and I feel so much better to have a support group.
livefreexoxo livefreexoxo
18-21
Dec 5, 2012