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I'm Not Complaining

I always knew my parents were never close.  Well, never close like my friends' parents seemed to be.  For the longest time they would just be near each other, but never really interact that much.  My dad would stay in our basement working all the time; I never had a relationship with him.  My mom took care of everything else.

As I got older I started to see the tension between them, and I heard or saw them arguing when they probably thought I didn't notice.   It wasn't until my mom started leaving the house for long periods of time that I knew something was going to change.

Randomly one day my parents announce that we're going to take a trip around Europe.  They acted all lovey-dovey when we were around, but as soon as they thought we were asleep or not paying attention they started arguing big time - literally screaming at each other.  As soon as we got back they told us they were separating.   One trip  I'll never forget.

So yeah, now I live with my mom - siblings have different living arrangements.  Once in a while I visit my dad, but I still don't like him - which is an improvement: hate to dislike very much.  Some of that dislike may come from the fact that he cheated on my mom with his cousin...which obviously cause the divorce.  Although he has been trying to be nice to me since they actually separated which is why I don't hate him as much, but still is very weird and uncomfortable to me.

But actually, having divorced parents isn't all that bad.  I went form being spoiled to having to struggle through life but I'm ok with it.  I'm a lot happier now (probably having to do with the fact I'm hardly ever around my father).

I suppose the worst part of divorce are the events - the arguing and yelling - that comes before they actually separate.  Sometimes I have to deal with one or the other trying to sabotage the other which is a pain, but now, I honestly believe that I would take this life over what it was before any day.

 

oogamama oogamama 16-17, F Mar 31, 2008

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