....

1. Attempted Suicide
2. Get kicked out of school
3. Smoke Cigs
4. Stop smoking Cigs and start again (reds for me)
5. Run away from home
6. Cried in school in front of others (no not when I was young, in high school)
7. Bring Brass Knuckles and a knife to school
8. Get in a fight in school
9. Hold grudges
10. Say its ok when its not
11. Burned myself intentionally
12. Practically starve myself to death
13. Thought about suicide and came close yesterday
14. Think/know death is going to be the best thing to happen to me
15. Tepee a house
16. Pretend to be something im not
17. Been rejected
18. Hurt myself in my sleep
19. Seen someone getting shot
20. Forced myself to puke
21. Been in a rehab type facility (in patient and out patient)
22. Broke my pact
23. Failed many classes
24. Played hooky many times
25. Smiled while hurting myself
26. Listened to It Ends Tonight before my suicide attempt
27. Put up the wall so to speak
28. Found out the real me
29. Hate myself
30. Been drugged
31. Angry at myself
32. Looked over the Coronado bridge thinking how beautiful it would be to jump
33. Going to my psychologist
34. stared at someone the whole class
35. Told someone face to face that I hate them
36. Gotten hurt by someone I thought I could trust
37.Sitting alone in dark outside and just cried as I watch cars drive by
38. Failed myself
39. Cried after seeing myself in the mirror
.....
iminpain iminpain
18-21, M
1 Response Aug 8, 2010

man, havent you done anything happy? try to think of 50 things you've done that ARE happy or at least NOT so sad- you make me want to cry- Im sorry you're so lost