About Me... :)

My name is Ellie. I'm 19 years old. A lot of people have messaged me asking me to share a story about my life, so here it is. Here's 50 things about me... a little different than things I've done but whatever.

1. I grew up with a single mom. I don't know who or where my dad is.
2. We moved all over the place, but I've lived in the US my whole life.
3. I started drinking and doing drugs when I was 14. I smoked pot more often because it was easier to get ahold of.
4. I had a two year relationship with my old master, Frank (it was a master/slave relationship) when I was 15-17. During that time he made me stop drinking, smoking, and doing drugs. Best thing I got out of that relationship. I haven't done any of that stuff since.
5. When I was 16, I dropped out of high school. I never went back.
6. I met Brian, my boyfriend (now fiance!) when I was living in Philedelphia. I was 17.
7. I have 5 younger siblings, Kelsie (16), Erica (13), Nick (11), Ryan (7), and Bridgette (4).
8. My mother died last year on November 17, 2011 in a car crash. My siblings moved in with my grandmother.
9. This summer, Brian and I moved to Ohio for a job he got here.
10. I work at a recreation/ community center (It has a gymnastics center, basketball courts, a pool, a rec room, and some other rooms.) I jump around all day, but I deal mainly with special needs groups that come on field trips.
11. I'm an assistant, and the pay is next to nothing. However, I love it.
12. I would love to get my GED and maybe even go to college. Someday. It'll happen.
13. My favorite color is yellow.
14. I think that society is messed up and when someone tells you to conform you should just say '**** You'
15. I try not to regret. But I do. I missed my teenage years.
16. I have been pregnant three times, I've given birth twice. I do not raise any children.
17. The first pregnancy was when I was 16. It was with Frank. It was an accident and I was freaked out, so I got an abortion. The absolute worst mistake I've ever made.
18. The second pregnancy was about three months after Brian and I started going out. I was 17. I had the baby, her name is Lucie and she was the most beautiful baby, but I felt like I wasn't mature enough to raise her, so I gave her up for adoption to a couple in their early 40s who had been desperatley trying to concieve for over 10 years. Giving Lucie to them was one of the best things I ever did.
19. My third pregnancy ended unexpectedly last year around Christmas. I was 19 weeks pregnant with my third baby. I went into labor and Delaney Grace was born, stillborn. She would have been a year old tomorrow. I just remember the doctor looking at her, saying something about her weighing 8 ounces...
20. I hate people who complain.
21. I love sarcasm.
22. I hate when people assume things about me that aren't true, just because of where I came from.
23. I don't want sympathy. I want respect.
24. I believe in all that sappy romantic ****. I really do.
25. I think that somewhere out there, there's a God or a higher power or somebody watching over us. I believe that there's something out there
26. I believe that we were meant to live for so much more.
27. I think people need to shut up and stop complaining. Don't just sit on your *** expecting everything to just 'work out.' Because it won't. Success takes a long time, a lot of hard work, a hell of a lot of failure, and a crazy drive.
28. I am allergic to gluten (including wheat), dairy, eggs, and peanuts.
29. It might take my whole life for me to do it, but I'm going to get out of this. This poverty. When I was a kid, the only meal I usually had was school lunch. Guess what it usually included? One of those things I'm allergic to.
30. I think people need to just BE KIND for no reason at all. Talk to someone no one else talks to. Wave to kids on school buses. Smile at people.
31. You can't believe how happy I am when someone gives me a ******* smile. Makes my whole day better.
32. Without that kindness, god knows where I'd be today. I had an elementary teacher in second grade who would bring me lunch EVERY DAY, even when I moved on to third, fourth, fifth and sixth grade. For five years that woman gave me a gluten free, dairy free, egg free, peanut free lunch, just because she knew my family couldn't afford to buy food at all, let alone gluten free food, which is really expensive.
33. I believe that smiles are the soul's kisses.
34. I believe in angels.
35. I think a simple 'I'm sorry' can do powerful things.
36. I love making simple things, like 'a box full of things I picked up on the sidewalk on the walk home while I was thinking about you', and giving them to the people I love.
37. I think that strong is what's left once you use up all your weak.
38. I wish I had run cross country in high school.
39. I love Imagine Dragons. Every time I hear It's Time, I cry.
40. However, my favorite song is Dog Days are Over. Mmm.
41. I thank God every night for everything I have, even though it's next to nothing in the eyes of an average American, it's all I need and more. Brian, my family, a roof over my head, food, a job, my health.
42. My mom used to tell me to just be normal. Blend in. I didn't want that. My best friend's mom had this old sewing machine, and she gave it to me for my birthday when I was 7. It was my first  present ever. I would rake yards and with the money I went to Goodwill and bought clothes. I would go home, cut them up, and sew them into crazy things. I would wear my hair in different ways every day, I loved braids the best. I wore earrings I would make with my friend (her mom did it for a living). I started taking care of myself by the time I was 4 or 5, but 7 is the age when I really started acting like an adult.
43. I try to always make friends with people the moment I meet them, because if I'm mean to them, I'll probably never get to know what they're really like.
44. (sort of continuation from 42) I never have and never will be normal. I was not born to wear slouchy sweatshirts and old jeans every day just because I didn't have any money. From the time I was 4 years old, I've always had the "There's always a way" mindset. People say I looked weird, I said my clothes had character.
45. My creativity ended around age 14. The crowd I was hanging with convinced me to start drugs. I didn't care what I looked like. I didn't have the energy or focus level to create my outfits, I was just thinking about when the next time I could get high would be.
46. If I can do it, you can do it.
47. **** you if you hit women that don't want you to hit them. That's not manly, that's cowardly.
48. I love to love.
49. My grandmother was just diagnosed with liver cancer and she and my five younger siblings moved into Brian and my two bedroom apartment. (the second room isn't technically even a bedroom). I'm freaking out.
50. I have no money. Absolutely nothing. Sometimes I get overwhelmed. But I've learned that our lives can change with every breath we take, and so you have to just embrace the moment. Never know if it'll be your last.

So if you have more questions, all you have to do is ask. Hope that cleared a few things up though. I don't give a **** if you expected a list about sex.

I don't know how many EPs do this, but I was thinking maybe I'd start a blog. Maybe not here, but somewhere. Does anyone do that? Would anyone read it?
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2 Responses Dec 13, 2012

Well written, and I wish you happiness in the future

wish you the best i too was down a similar path until i met my girlfriend and had my daughter, i was drinking a case of budlight a night thats about 23 dollars every night and goin to work at 6 so 150 a week on beer

yea it was hard but i now am a better person and i love being a father