50 Things That Could Define Me.Thoughts and statements.
1. Psychological tests give me extreme lack of empathy scores.
Apparently I am a psychopathic narcissist.
Yet my empathy level to connect with the weak, in despair, seems to be extremely high as well as with animals? How does that make me a psychopath?
2. I have a recurring dark urge to kill those who harass, stalk, violate my basic fundamental rights. Not fight, not destroy but kill. Try to control the urge with reading, isolation for self-counseling and healing, binge eating yet when mentioned individuals keep pushing it, it is hard to guarantee the strength of self control I'd have in the future.
3. I don't like children who don't act as such. I despise perversion in young people.
4. I don't know what is to love someone apart from my family and my pets.
5. I liked, I appreciated people but I don't think I've fallen in love ever.
6. My IQ tests, be it taken online or offline are always minimum above 145, yet my true IQ is 162. But my EQ hovers in the extreme opposite.
7. I am a misanthrope. I believe we humans are the only invasive species to the planet.
8. I don't like to waste time with people when I have personal time.
I love to spend time with myself.
9. I despise stupid people.
10. I despise even more, evil people with no brains.
11. I love nature. Love the wisdom of trees, the innocence in the eyes of animals.
12. I think I am able to kill people who abuse animals. Or abuse the weak.
Weak and abused women, children and the elderly. To protect them, I would kill.
13. Probably my low EQ and low empathy is controlled by my high IQ, trying to logically go with the flow yet certain actions perpetrated by individuals I despise, could have the potential to trigger a situation in which rationale could go extinct.
14. I hate when I am bothered while I am reading, studying, spending time with myself, sleeping.
15. I love to sleep.
16. I hate mornings. I love nights.
17. I hate cheaters. In all ways. Corporate cheaters, romantic cheaters. Academic cheaters.
18. I despise those who use their tongues to bad mouth others. Instead of seeing the good side and qualities.
19. I believe in human rights, yet I know for the collective well being there are limitations. But, no matter what, basic fundamental rights shouldn't be violated, and if they are, anything done to the violators is justifiable to my eyes.
20. I despise busybodies, nosy and losers. I hate, stupidness in overall.
I hate religious obsession, collective madness and female hysteria.
21. I was raped in the street when I was 5 in Korea.
22. I am not traumatized at all from that experience.
23. I was group raped when 18. In Costa Rica.
24. I am not traumatized either.
25. I was drugged and raped when I was 31 in Korea
I am fine again. How so? I don't feel any emotions.
Why? I am still trying to figure out.
26. My IQ is genius level. And it has only been a curse. In my case, always score high, in real life, tasks come in easy, only people make me feel like they are wasting time. My time.
27. I don't feel superior. But I look like I feel like it. I can't connect with humans normally. My intentions are never successfully delivered to them.
28. My first language is Spanish.
29. I literally taught myself all of the other languages, six more, I speak.
Korean, well is from parents.
30. I can memorize an entire book if I am in a good mood.
31. I can have nasty brain farts.
33. I can gain and lose weight as I please.
34. I don't like to be skinny. Makes me feel weak.
35. I have had always felt great pleasure in beating people up.
36. Some, many say, I am cute? Wtf.
37. I wish I was a man, to join the military.
38. I loved guns but can't have one now.
39. I'm good at martial arts. Just have innate skills. Don't know how.
40. I am a psychopath. But if loving animals and nature and loving her own family aren't what psychopaths do. Then, I'm not.
41. I love reptiles. I have an obsessive appreciation for their species.
42. I can't sing but dance well. Anything. Great body coordination.
43. I am physically very strong.
44. I pray to kill my anger. To control the dark side.
45. I never had any dreams for myself.
46. I never saw myself getting married nor having kids.
47. I don't want to have kids.
48. I like to teach kids but don't like to have them around for anything else.
49. I appreciate Buddhism. It helps me control my darkness.
50. I always fulfill and get what I want. And so far, have never ever hurt anyone to make it happen. Not yet.