Once It's Done, You Can't Take It Back...

How do you deal with something like that? When you think you are strong enough to do the right thing and then you don't. Not only do you let yourself down, but you let down the people who matter most in your life.

Is it possible to forgive yourself? Can you keep your wrong choice from hurting anyone who matters? Can you not make the same mistake again? Where is this strength going to come from?

Too many questions, too many thoughts, too much rumbling around in your head...

purpleriz purpleriz
51-55, F
3 Responses Mar 11, 2009

We aren't perfect. We are people. If it had not been that, it would have been something else because that's what we do: we mess up. There is no way to protect other people from the damage we have done other than to explain to them that our bad decisions are not a statement about who they are, it is a statement about who we are. Yes, people get hurt because of things that we do, but ultimately it is about us, our fears, our weaknesses, our faults and failures. Don't let others believe lies about themselves ba<x>sed on decisions you have made; tell them the truth about who you are and why you did what you did instead. In the end, the only thing you can do is learn how to not do it again. Don't let your inability to forgive yourself keep you from learning about who you are and how to make the right choice next time.

I feel the same way. There is a certain set of mistakes I made that I don't think I can ever fully forgive myself for --- but if it were anyone else - I would want them to forgive themselves. I keep trying though - my not forgiving myself, in no way helps the person I hurt. I learned from it & keep trying to make things as right as I can.

There are so many times when I've felt the same way. If the thing you're doing is something recurring and repetetive, once you stop it gets easier to move away from it. If it was a one time mistake that caused a lot of pain, you need to make it clear to those around you that you are separate from "that person" who did whatever they did in the past. In a way, you need to prove yourself to you and to others.