What Made Me Who I Am Today

I found love to quick and became wounded to the point where now im broken, I feel like there is always that empty space inside me. I didn't always feel this way. I found love early...To early. My first love broke my heart and ever since Ive been dieing on the inside a little more each day. Feelings, thoughts ive tried it all, it only heals the pain for a little time, then bfore I know it the pain is back again, worst then the last time. Every break up... I die more on the inside. The pain has taken me over, the pain has almost completley torn out my heart. I can still love but I'm cautious about it, If I get hurt again who knows what will happen to me. I try to stay strong, I try to let go, its one of those situations where your head says yes and your heart says no, inbetween both is where I;m at...A state of confushion. Why me? Why this way? Its gotten to the point where I break my own heart breaking other peoples hearts. Maybe im not ment to love or be loved. who knows? I dont have any answers at this point in my life...Not one. Im like the walking dead. im shy, alone and on my own no matter how much it hurts I still feel the need to stay away from love, no one should ever feel what ive felt.