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My Psychosis and Their Difference Faces.

Visiting from the BPD forum. I have almost all of my history over there.

The type of psychosis I have endured is called brief reactive psychosis. This is psychosis that shows its ugly face during extreme times of stress. Things like this happened to me as far back as I can remember. I was a loner as a child and I had a ton of "Friends" that I talked to and believed where real. I would retreat and do that when my father was being abusive or if I thought he was going to be.

Then as a teen, if I ever got majorly stressed, I would do a lot of the same things I did as a child. When my grandfather died, I did the "word-salad" thing a lot around my mom and then, I was finally taken to a doctor at this time. I have experienced much delirium (the docs said probably due to the bipolar and BPD, PTSD, major depressive disorder and psychosis).

I have also had the drug withdrawal psychosis. I was withdrawing from Effexor and it threw me for a loop. I broke everything in the house and used broken glass to slice up my leg (says my roommate at the time). Then I was kept in a rubber-like room being observed all night long with the light on.

I also was withdrawing from pain medication and had psychosis. I was feeding my daughter and took the tray off because she was finished. I saw her HIT the floor, face first!! I start screaming and crying and looked up at the highchair where she was still sitting, strapped in. That was one of the scariest episodes I have ever had.

I really don't "hear" things but I do "see" a lot of random things here and there, but only under extreme stress. That is why my docs didn't diagnose me with schizophrenia. They said it was a schizotpy (spell?) type thing going on.

Anyways, I'll take up no more time in this post with this because it can go on and on.

EccentricOne EccentricOne 26-30, F 5 Responses Apr 19, 2009

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HI, thanks for sharing. I think we are all courageous for letting it out for the world to read about. <br />
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I have similar things to you in the way that i dont hear voices, or hallucinate.<br />
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My thoughts stem from me 'seeing" or visualizing people saying things to me in the past. Things that make me believe that i have done bad things to people.<br />
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I know when i havent slept properly, usually becuase i havent exericed recently - i picture people saying things to me that scare me. For me, medication only made me big. Exercise was a big helper.

do you think the medications only made you worse. I guess i am schizophrenic but am handeling it well. I have an appointment finally to see a doctor and I really am scared of medicine. I think that we are just more enlightened human beings... it is awful what has happened to you, you are a really beautiful girl with an inocent mind. I don't see things but i hear them all the time. I can concentrate if i try hard.

Your awesome for sharing you experience. Mental illness gets a bad rep and it is nice to here someone share about their experience in a matter of fact way. I'm sure you are a lot stronger than most : )

Thanks for your comment. I can totally relate with the "black things"<br />
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The things I see are always distorted and black. I usually catch the tail end of them running off too. Like, I don't ever actually look up and see something black sitting there, I see it running off. <br />
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I am sorry to hear about your son. Is he in therapy or on medications for his hallucinations? Or do you not want to go that route?

I have temporal lobe epilepsy..this type is very similar to schizophrenia and sometimes misdiagnosed....i have to control it like epilepsy and stress, lack of sleep bring it on...i see black things crawling and flying, i also saw a bathroom rug turn into a snake and then back again...i have severe mood swings, and can smell things...i keep it all pretty much under control....but your story about feeding your baby...i also was breastfeeding and looked and my baby was on the floor and then looked again and she was in my arms....my 11 year old son stayed up all night new years eve and by the next day at 2pm while he was walking around awake he also started having hallucintions