I feel like every time I think my family is just about to hit a golden era, it just gets worse. I feel like the glue that keeps them together but no one really sees the glue do they. When you look at something that's fixed it's almost invisible. And that's me. Little miss glue.. Who almost never seems to last. Everything eventually shatters. And no one knows unless I tell them it's broken because I put on such a good act. It's not like you just see when someone's truly upset with going home just by looking at them either. I just want it to change back to when I was six or so. When I started being able to see my mom. And when my dad made me cinnamon toast every morning. Not when the chance of my dad and brother hitting each other is higher than them telling each other they love them. I want to go back to a time when I knew my dad and mom would live together forever or when all my brothers were at least in speaking terms with. I might not of been close with my eldest one but if it was silence instead of him wanting to punch me, I would be happier. If I could see my little niece and nephew I actually grew to love when I lived with them. If I could just be a naive girl who didn't have a clue what it felt like to have someone break it to you a family member ODed at school before the third bell. If I didn't know what this **** felt like I don't know if I would be me. But I know I would probably be happier than I am now.
LoverOfAllSouls LoverOfAllSouls
18-21, F
Aug 20, 2014