Cold War

My girlfriend and my best friend are in some sort of Cold War right now.

They're not having a bad row or something... It's just the fact that he (my best friend) is very annoyed by my girlfriend who's admittedly sometimes a bit bitchy. But instead of telling her what his problem is, he's just annoyed and hurt. He never tells her and so she can't take it back and says she won't stop it till he says he wants to.

Today (after we were in a pub with about eight people, my girlfriend and best friend being there too) my best friend told me that he's fed up with my girlfriend and doesn't want to come anymore to our gatherings cause he feels that she hates him. I told him that I'll talk with her but he said I mustn't and I had to promise that I don't tell her anything.

I won't tell her anything cause I'll not break a promise I gave my best friend. But what am I gonna do now? I don't want to lose him! I want him to still meet with us! It's not fair that I can't do anything! I just told him that he HAS to speak to her cause I'd be really really sad if I lost him but I fear he won't... Quo vadis?

GothGrrrl GothGrrrl
18-21, F
1 Response May 12, 2007

Your friend is right in ONE aspect, don't get in the middle. I was once put in the middle of a very similar situation and all it got me was the loss of 2 good friends. I will NEVER get in the middle of anyone's disagreements again. If your friend will NOT talk to your g/f than I am confused. In my opinion he SHOULD, for the sake of your friendship. Is he jealous that he has to share you with someone else. My ex husbands best friend hated me, without even knowing me, simply because in his mind i was a threat to their friendship, which was ironic, because i ALWAYS encouraged their friendship. Over time, when he realized that me becoming his best friends wife did not mean he would lose the friendship with him, he eventually warmed up to me and infact he and i became friends ..... until the divorce, oh well, i never expected him to remain friends with me when his closest friend was going through a divorce. It may sound silly but maybe your firend is simply jealous and fears he will lose your friendship and often what we think might happen we CREATE it to happen. So tell your friend, that for YOUR sake you ask him to speak to your girlfriend, if he won't let the situation ride out, he might come along. BUT do yourself a favour, DO NOT get in the middle because I assure you, that for YOU it would be a lose/lose situation. Good Luck!!