Alone In Popularity

I'm not sure if any of this is going to make sense. Just a warning.
I go to a small school, so we all know eachother. Last year I was really shy and only hung out with one person while also hanging out with another at times. Somewhere near the end of the year I came out of my shell, and this year I'm not afraid to speak anymore.
But then I stopped and realized how none of my friends are near anything like me. They all care about fashion, boys, and are always bugging me about the way I dress and how I do my hair, etc. Lately I felt like I wanted to go back to my lonely self, because atleast I wouldn't feel like nobody understands me; I was happy lonely, but now I have friends and, though I laugh and smile with them, I'll never feel like we're the same. They can be heartless, find me strange, and the one I usually hang out with is probally the worst. I feel like they're sunshine, and I'm two shades darker.
My family thinks I'm strange-or atleast they would if they knew more about me. They don't know how much I daydream, and I never realized how...realistic they are. Although she's not really doing anything that bad, I feel like my mom is pushing me a bit to hard in dance. My dad is so opinionated, and I hate stating my opinion or arguing. Debating is his hobbie. My brothers all think I'm dumb-and I guess I don't really help, joking all the time like I am dumb.
I go on the internet to see if I can find someone similar to me-and yes, I have. I found a teen site and there are a bunch with so many similarities to me; but, when I feel the urge to speak to them, I feel like my problems aren't as bad as theirs. Some parents' are divorced, some have broken hearts, etc.
How are my problems that bad?
I don't know whether any of this made sense...but I was searching online and remember getting some music from this site a while back. So I just thought I'd come to the experience project...though my problems can't be that bad as some of yours. I'm just a hormonal teenage girl; everything feels wrong.
TwoShadesDarker TwoShadesDarker
13-15, F
2 Responses Nov 27, 2012

I don't thing your problems are any less significant. I passed my teenage 5 years ago and I still feel myself alienated amid a group. If you think talking will help, go ahead and voice it. Never feel intimidated by others, they haven't lived your life, they cannot possibly know.

everyone has different problems... its how u cope that counts

Yeah. I know. I just feel a bit guilty over it...