I Have Severe Gender Dysphoria

I was first diagnoed about 10 years ago but because i was married and had children I had no choice but to push it down and hide. I tried to commit sucide at least 20 teimes over the last 10 years the last time was july 13 2012 the ambulance found me with out a hear beat in the middle of a farmers field where I had over dosed on my perscription pain medication. I was in the icu for 3 weeks with resudial brain damage and a alot of other problems because my brain didnt get oxygen. I have finally made a well recovey from that but have since moved away from my family and found drs and councelors that are helping me transition i was found out to have xxy chromosomes and a birth defiect in my brain with my pitutary gland where i was only getting a very small amout of the male hormone. So i tried testerone replacement and it made me violently sck. so after a few months off of the i started hrt estridol and 2 other hormones prescribed by my dr. needless to say i am finally for the first tiem in my life feeling like my body matches my mind. and am thankfull i am alive. yesterday i have my first arrousal experience as a woman. my genetals have shrunken and no longer function at all so i feel nothing there the dr says it the hormones but i have breasts and all across my chest i felt arroused in the same way i did as a male down there has anyone elese experienced this? any way i am going to have a bilateral orchestomy sometime over the next week or so and then bottom surgery first simetime over the next 6 months then top surgery. I cant wait untill i am totally complete but i have gained so much confidance I have alwauys had a female sized body and voice due to the xxy chromosomes so i pass very easily so i am living out in the world full time. I really wish i would have listened to my body 10 years ago. but i am now a beautifull 39 year old womani hasve lots of experiences to share and would like to hear from others please feel free to write anytime
Jenni3673 Jenni3673
36-40, T
Jan 17, 2013