I'm Just Tired Of Waiting And Hoping ...

Love always evades me . Ever since I was a teenager , saw other pretty girls around me dating /having boyfriends etc. Then I had the usual teenage crushes but I had low self esteem I considered myself ugly. I went on with my life and with my low self esteem never thought I would find love ever . I graduated and started working . Suddenly I realized I was actually very pretty and noticed how many stares I attract whenever I go out . This felt really good and I started taking special care to my appearance . Gone were the clothes which were trying to hide me . I got a new hair cut , started wearing stylish clothes etc . I started hoping I would eventually find love . Maybe I had to grow as a person before actually being able to find the right one . Every year I keep hoping saying to myself , this year is gonna be the year I'll find someone for sure . it never happens . Whenever I see an attractive man and notice him staring back , I think maybe this is it . And if there is some spark , I hope this will lead to something. Unfortunately it never does . I've had my share of heart breaks and made a fool of myself a couple of times too . Men stare at me all the time . The few who ask me out go only by my looks or are total jerks . I've still not found that genuine man who sees the me inside apart from my looks . I've had enough of waiting and hoping now . I'm the sweetest lady and have so much love to give but no one is there for me . I don't know why . I feel sorry for myself whenever I see happy couples . From now on, I'll try very hard not to notice any man and look away quickly if one stares at me . I'm done ..:(

lonefairy lonefairy
26-30, F
11 Responses Nov 27, 2009

You will soon find that man. Start looking for someone who has same interest and do not just date . Make sure you are dating the right guy too, someone who will take your time to know you.

When I read you post I feel like I am the one who wrote it ! fir the exception that I have never had low self esteem. I was always pretty and nice and everyone around me keep saying: the man who will be in your life, your partner is such a lucky person.... that person never showed up I am turning 30 soon and while all my friends are having babies, I am still here, hanging around trying to do my best to be happy alone ....

Love isn't for everyone and that isn't a bad thing. So many things have turned me off from wanting a boyfriend. I just want freedom and independence from the unnecessary drama.

But in the long run don't you base whom you choose on looks keep in mind a genuine man is not necessarily one whom is gong to be attractive some might not be I'm a good guy but I have been hurt multiple times to the point I have given up because of all the superficiality that women have nowadays I'm not knocking on how u feel but it seems no one seems to realize this

The similar case is with me,girl. The most important consequence is that my career and studies are being harmed. I am from India and I've just passed high school, preparing for a good college. But ever since I stepped into high school, i dont know if they were the hormones or my heart growing up, I became frantic for a sweet, understanding, beautiful, adorable and loving girl. . . And trust me onlyfor loving purpose and not at all for physical satisfaction i like other high school guys are up to.space. and after that my feelings started growing and growing like very fast. I started dreaming and feeling how good it would be to love a girl, live in a cozy apartment, never let her feet touch the floor, have coffee with her sitting on my lap at sunset and these are just the basics. I wanted to be the king of true love but things didnt go my way. I got disheartened, met a few *******, buried them all alive and was all alone with pain and sadness which didnt let me study. This caused minor depression but here I am , alovelthough my sex IQ is the best in the school my friends say, I still am waiting for that very special ordinary girl who would satisfy the love beast inside me. I am one who can be drenched in true love for years without even being in a hurry for a lip kiss. I am great actually :D
Lets see when will time give me my love.

lonefairy-<br />
Never give up.<br />
And, never feel like a fool for taking a chance on love and putting yourself out there.<br />
You have courage, strength and hope.<br />
Love will come to you. <br />
<br />
You seem wonderful to me.<br />
My best advice is to get to know and truly love yourself.<br />
Immerse yourself in things you love.<br />
Pursue your interests.<br />
And, enjoy living your life.<br />
Your light will shine and people will be drawn to you.<br />
And, perhaps one of them will make your heart skip a beat.<br />
<br />
good luck... Sasha

Just forget it then. People aren't worth that. Just be happy with yourself! All is fair in death... Plus, you don't want the baggage and drama that most couples have.

Thanks all for nice words but I'm truly done . I've hoped so much for this and made too much of a fool of myself . I'd rather fill my heart with hatred and give up on love like I did a few years ago than continue with this . At least I was happier then . Now I am miserable wanting something I can't have .

Hi there LF...just like you, it would appear that I was never destined to find true love. I thought I had met a girl who felt the same way about me as I did about her. Only she was using me and leading me on, it would seem, as I was better than nothing until she got a "better" offer. That truly devastated me, and it pretty much shattered all my hopes and dreams.

That was almost ten years ago...and it was the last time I ever came anywhere near to finding a relationship . I still hate her to this day for what she did. At least I learned that I should never make anybody else responsible for bringing happiness into my life.

Beauty starts inside, and to begin the process you have to make peace with yourself, why don't you get up tommorow morning and start thinking about some funny stuff in your life that happened to you. Think of some jokes, remember everything that is good in your life.<br />
<br />
Don't say no to life, start with a resounding YES everyday, now go out there and have fun silly girl : )

Hey now, chicky. Is that any kind of attitude to take? Look, I'm fugly, ( And I don't have a nice body either) and I have low self-esteem, but I found love twice. In my life. Of course, the first time, I had no idea what I was doing. I managed to **** it up anyway. Never give up. If you are good-looking, you can have just about anyone. Pick and choose, baby, it's like a free candy-mart for you.

If a guy stares at you then he's interested. Don't look down or away. That will seem cold and you aren't that at all. Keep trying. Be natural and cheerful. First impressions do count, huge, huge, huge.I must say, I understand your feelings 100%.