And It Is Wonderful

I had brutal periods since I was eleven years old. Having children helped somewhat, but the periods were still bad.

Menopause for me took a couple of years, during which I simply got my period less and less frequently. I never had hot flashes or any other symptoms except for a little nausea.

According to Jared Diamond (author of The Third Chimpanzee), menopause is advantageous to human women because childbirth is so dangerous, and menopause prevents a woman from bearing children too late in life, enabling her to survive to raise the children she already has.

Since menopause, I don't have to worry about what day of the month it is. I don't have to plan trips around my period. I don't have to buy feminine hygiene products, or worry about not having them when and where I need them. If I travel abroad, I don't have to worry about figuring out where to buy them or how to ask for them.I don't have to worry about blood-stained clothes or wonder if I can find a bathroom in time to avoid leaking. I don't spend two days of every month in agony anymore. Menopause is WONDERFUL!
Aeolosoma Aeolosoma
56-60, F
10 Responses Feb 21, 2008

Didvyour sex life change after menopause? My wife has no urge or desire anymore and I am very upset and starting to think about going outside the marriage. What is your opinion?

it IS super not to have to deal with the curse of Eve ever-- and no risk of pregnancy to deal with... its the greatest

Souchong, There still is no fire at home. I have great desire for my wife, but she has none for me. I have tried to get her aroused, but she'll change the subject, or ask me "may I help you?" This is a huge turn off for me, so I have stopped trying. I love to kiss too, but she has even stopped that. We kiss hello and goodbye, and that's it. I just try to keep myself busy, now, with work, yard work, golfing and some fishing. Also, a lot of fantasizing. If you ever want to chat sometime, let me know.

Good greif... A mirror image of my marriage.... I had to leave her in the end, married 40 years... It was very hard to do but i knew i would cheat on her sooner or later....I could'nt live the lie of being happy any longer..It was making me ill.

I'm sorry to hear about your situation. If the keeping the intimacy alive in the relationship is important to you both there are ways and means of keeping the home fires burning. The older gnerations used to believe the sexual side of relationships ended in the forties and I can see where that premise arose. I certainly don't believe that because our need for intimacy doesn't decrease just because we get older! I hope you were able to resolve the issue.

Also, I forgot to mention......She went through menopause right after we married..

After menopause, did you lose your sexual desires ? Right after my wife and I married (2000), she no longer wanted sex. That was one of the reasons why I married again......for great, safe sex. I have been VERY disappointed in our love life. I have asked her to see a doctor, to see if there is a horomal problem. She said that she will not take hormones, because they can cause cancer. I have given up on having much of a love life with her, and it hurts.

Sounds very similar, there must be something that can be done? I am not prepared to throw 43 years of marrage away, but is is very frustrating. I think I have tried every thing.Please let me knoe if u find the magic cure

I just want to say that for me the experience has been a strange one. I never had really bad periods or all the other really pumped up symptoms that PMT can cause each month. I always knew they were coming soom because I would be moody for a few days and want to eat alot of sweet things. Anyway symptoms of approaching menopause started when i was 37 when my baby was 5 mouths old and I had a period then nothing for about 12 weeks, then another few months passed. I was like what's going on, the doctor thought I was depressed so he gave something to help me with my mood swings, I packed them in after 2 months because it made me feel too different, too chilled, actually and did not recognise myself, i was horrible then coming off them, until they cleared my system. I had blood test one after another and then last summer I was experiencing rollacoaster emotions about everything, crying one minute laughting the next. The doctor gave me antipressants again, but after 3 days I could barely get though the day, foggy all the time. Anyway i went to the health food shop and got something natural to take, within 4 days I felt miles better and I drop the tablets the doctor gave me. The female doctor toook some more blood, nothing unsual again and then in November last year I had some more test again. This time I rang the surgery to find out the results and the receptionist said my blood's were normal, i was like, how can that be, because by then I was experiencing hot flushes about 20 a day, vision problems, fatigue, indigestion, mild mood swings and no sex drive. I said to the receptionist i will still come to the surgery to see my doctor and see whereelse we can go. Anyway as i walked in and sat down, i said to the doctor I know my results have come back normal, but I don't feel normal at all. And he's like, who told you that and I then explained that the receptionist the other day on the phone had informed me. He then said, well yes everything is normal except your FSH is through the roof, I was like so what does that mean and he informed me that I may only have one more year of fertility, so will have to take measures about getting pregnant but I am almost at the end of the menopause, I have about one year left, if that. Anyway he hop off to see one of his more expereinced collegues for advice and passed me to a more capable female doctor. There was talk of a coil being fitted and tablets, too young really for hormone replacement HRT because of the side effects. I got calcium and vitamin D, alanalac (spelt wrongly I expect) I can't take it because the stress I get causes my throat to close for tablets to be swallowed. Anyway now i have been a few months down the road and many of the earlier flush symptoms have settled down so it looks like I'm almost there for the full menopause being over. My mum is just starting the menopause and she is 63, this is such a mystery to me, I can not understand why I have began so early. I kind of tying to come to terms with the new me. I am learning to drive and started a course at the college and looking to the future for a career. I doing all these positive things but inside I feel like but now I have run out of time so can't help feeling sad at times for stuff and am faced i guess that i have to worry about my bones and what the heck is going to happen to my body long term. I spoke to the surgery yesterday about a menopause help group and there aren't any in my areas and I made a comment about setting up one and the receptionst said if I did they would support it so anyway I have spoken to another friend who may be happy to be happy to help me set one up, to help and support the women who wander from the surgery and wonder what the heck now.

OMG i have HEAVY periods and theye not nice i dunno what to do anymore!!!

I love your honesty and can soooooo relate!!

I got a couple of hot flashes. I just felt weak and ate a lot for a few minutes. <br />
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Now that it seems to be over (it's been five months since I had a period) I don't have many sexual feelings anymore. I just like being celebate. <br />
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I hated having periods. They never hurt, but they were so messy.