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When I have good days I can actually function like a human being, I can be happy and social and go out and do stuff and meet people. I have hopes for the future and things really seem all right.

When I have my bad days, It's hard to even get out off bed, I isolate myself totally, don't check in with people online (ep, fp, msn) or even check my mail, don't answer the phone or even the door if someone comes knocking. I don't feel like doing anything, just stay in bed in my personal cloud of darknessy. I'm tired and sad and angry and I can't even tell why because I don't know myself. I just know from the moment I wake up. that it's a bad day and that I have to get through it somehow,
Grakka Grakka 31-35, F 1 Response Apr 15, 2012

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Perhaps you should talk to a professional? They've done the so then people in your position can turn to someone who understands and is knowledgeable about what you're going through.

I've talked to professionals. Many professionals, and I have been eating medication for it.. and It worked I didn't have bad days anymore but on the other hand I didn't actually have good days either I got numb since it blocked all strong emotions not just the bad once so I couldn't be happy either

:( I've never been through what you're going through so I can't say much that can help, but perhaps just hold on to hope that there are more good days than bad, or that you have good days at all. Perhaps they'll have better medication available soon - a family member used to suffer from some form of depression, but since starting on their new medication has improved greatly.

Have you tried exercising and a healthy diet? It could help, even if only a little bit. I guess the main this is hope and support, hold on to those as much as possible.