Shattered, Re-shattered, and Shattered Again By My Life Situation

This is a hard story to tell.  I am a professor at an institution where I get to advise undergrads as well as grad students.  That said, let me just say it...my grad student, a woman that I helped bring from Pakistan to study in the USA, is now about to become my now ex-husbands new wife...my 15 year old son is devastated.  My son has nothing to do with her...oh, my ex is 53 and she is 28.  So many details, but the worst of it is that my ex and I work at the same university and she is still a grad student in my department (another adviser of course).  She has openly said she will do everything she can to get me fired, take my job, has written nasty trash about me on student sites, and tells other students not to take my class.  Most people have figured out that she is poison, but this has made going to work horrible.  They walk around campus like they are king and queen...every morn I walk from my car to my office feeling like I am going to vomit...in fact I have several times...the stress is killing me...my son is so hurt and has told me he hates his dad...we have joint custody, so half the time he is with him and he has told his dad he wants nothing to do with her and wants to live with me full-time.  The ex is a control freak so he couldn't care less what my son wants...in the state I live you can not have someone of the opposite sex over for an all-nighter if their is an under aged child in the residence...they marry and she can live there.  My son is freaking.  He hates her, refers to her as "the *****".  I promised him when the time comes (her moving in) we will go to the lawyer.  I am hurt and scared...and feel like if I start screaming I will not stop.

Snarkygirl Snarkygirl
46-50, F
4 Responses Mar 28, 2009

Oh...and tomfool...as for finding another job<br />
<br />
1. the economy...duh<br />
<br />
2. and, he is the one who can go find another job, why should I leave when he is the one who should leave...he is the one sleeping with students...do you want your kids in a classroom with this guy? I don't care how old the student is, you should NEVER cross those boundaries...it is ethically and morally wrong.

SoSuMe and MegJgeM,<br />
Thanks for your support!

tomfool, <br />
you don't know the whole story...he is not a good father, and the tramp he is with is evil... oh, by the way 12 years younger is much less then 20 something years younger...he could be her father...my son has written his dad off because his dad has written him off...I spent 3 years after our divorce making sure they had a good relationship and all that time the snake and his tramp sabotaged me creating a hostile work enviroment...they will not do that again unless she wants to be expelled and he wants to lose his job...he will never be forgiven for that by his son, nor will he forgive his dad for allowing this woman to use and abuse me...and it is BS that boys always need a man in their lives...my dad was the son of a single mom (during the depression no less!)...he was a great man...he never cheated on my mom and worshipped her like she was a goddess...And, I can assure you I have NO intention of getting involved with anyone...unlike my ex and you, my kid comes first...And finally, please don't ask me to feel sorry for you or tell me what to do about my situation to justify your own bad behavior...you are a slime doggy for cheating on your wife and karma will eventually bite you in the a**...I came here to this site to meet like minded people not to be lectured to by people with no values...so please go away and DO NOT add to my misery with your self serving tripe...

*hugs*