I Attribute My Sp To Grief

The first time I experienced SP was about 3 months after my 2nd son was born and a couple of weeks after my older brother passed away. I was a little frightened by it, but was certain that since it happened after a nightmare about my brother, that it was caused by the sadness, stress and anxiety I felt from losing my brother. This was in 2011. I just recently lost my step father in October and my Papa (who raised me and my 2 brothers) in November. I also found out I was pregnant with my 3rd child at the end of November. I'm not even sure how far along I am and I had another bout of SP about a week ago. This time I had woken up in the middle of the night and while trying to fall asleep I heard a ringing in both of my ears that felt like it was consuming my entire head. I tried to scream out and open my eyes, but couldn't move. I thought I was having a stroke. Now I am terrified to go to sleep and my anxiety has sky rocketed. Hopefully I can lower my stress level for the health of me and my little one. I guess since this was an unexpected pregnancy for me and my hubby and having to quit smoking and taking my anxiety Meds, it may be a little more difficult than expected. But, I am still hopeful that with meditation and a lot of prayers I will feel better.
momof3yo momof3yo
26-30, F
1 Response Dec 5, 2012

Hi there, I to suffer from sleep paralysis. Well, I used to suffer from it. Now I just have it. For a long time I thought I was alone in this because any time I would ask somebody if it had ever happened to them they would look at me like I was some kind of weirdo and say "no".
It's a pretty terrifying thing. Can't move, feel like you can't breathe. you try to scream for help but can't actually make a sound. Some people even see menacing things standing around them or even feel like these things they are seeing are the cause of the problem itself. The latter has only happened to me a few times and it is scary as hell, but the just waking up paralyzed has happened quite often. The only thing I could do was to fight and fight until I could move something. A finger, a hand, turn my head, or something and then I would wake up. That could take seconds or minutes and if it took minutes it felt like hours.
A little while ago I got interested in hypnosis. I wondered if maybe it could help me induce a deeper state of meditation. As I started to read up on it I noticed that there was quite a few similarities between the deep states of hypnosis described and what I would feel in sleep paralysis. So, I was determined no matter how scared I was that the next time it happened I would try the same things they do in hypnosis in my paralysis. The first thing I would do is tell myself that I was going to count down from 5 to 1 and as soon as I hit 1 that I would be completely calm and that my breathing would be back to normal.
So of course the next time it happened I totally forgot to do it and freaked out like I normally did. When I broke free I realized that I forgot and was mad at myself. I even wondered if it was really possible for me to do this but then I said to myself, "If I can consciously think while this is happening to me than I have to at least be able to try it." The next time it happened I remembered. It was extremely hard to stay focused while being so scared but I did it and IT FREAKEN WORKED!!! As soon as I was done counting down I was completely calm and breathing normally. Then I told myself I would count form 3 to 1 and then I would be awake. I did and as soon as I hit 1 I was awake. Now I even kind of look forward to it happening because just like hypnosis you can tell yourself all kinds of things to happen, like instead of waking up you tell yourself that you will fall back to sleep into a wonderful dream. That does take some practice. More often at first once you have gained control you will just wake up but at least you now have the control and no longer have to be afraid of falling asleep.
I really hope this helps. I truly know just how terrifying this can be and doing this has changed my life.