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So I am talking to a guy right now, and we haven't gone out yet, but i'm really nervous. I keep thinking this will never work, but then I tell myself yes it can. I feel like if I don't tell the person then I am misleading and trapping them. What are some experiences you all have had? When and how should you tell someone, because like it or not it can be a deal breaker and a shocker. That's why for me being friends is the best thing, because you get to know them and feel comfortable with them.
searchingfar searchingfar 22-25, F 2 Responses Feb 19, 2012

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I was have to agree completely with aktor1970. I've dated a guy once and I really liked him a lot, but one day we were talking and I asked him what he liked about me. He said every thing but the hair on my chin. It killed me in side that someone I liked so much could be that cruel. Needless to say that relationship was over right then and there. I still struggle every day with myself but I have been gifted with finding the most wonderful man in the world whom I'm engaged to now. He knows of my hirsutism and how much I struggle with it yet all he can say is I love the way you are and I wouldn't change anything about you. I'm blessed to have him in my life, he is my rock. There are guys out there for all of us just the way we are, hair and all. I still struggle with this condition I don't feel like he should love me because of it but he's here by my side through it all.

Congratulations. :) Well done. *hugz*

honestly that is so beautiful that you found someone....how did u tell him?? and Congrats!!!! <3

First, above all and before anything else, you need to see if the guy is decent and respectful at all. If he can't treat you right just in general before knowing anything more about you than what he may already know, then that's just as much of a "deal breaker" as the details you're initially keeping to yourself. <br />
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A good reminder is that you sharing this kind of thing might not happen in the first meeting. It might not even happen in the first couple or few meetings. You need to develop (and he needs to earn) mutual trust, but it must also be cultivated and nourished over time. Once you truly feel you can share that, just delicately put it out there in conversation. How he reacts will tell you everything. As with any and every relationship, it's always touch-and-go, so stay relatively guarded in case it turns sour. One never knows. But it could totally be great, too.<br />
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Take it easy. Remember to breathe. Be yourself, but don't fall for any bologna from anybody. You should be okay. I wish you the best. *hugz*