My dad is a manipulative bastard... but for some reason I still love him.  I don't want to.  He abused me in every way imaginable... nearly killed me several times. 

And a part of me still loves him.

I'm not in contact with him now.  I fled my hometown last fall in a desperate attempt to save myself.  I've not spoken to him in months, and he does not know where I am.  This is good.

Because especially as Father's Day looms, I remember the good times... and hate the part of me that still loves him.
Plaid Plaid
31-35, F
3 Responses Jun 13, 2011

I do understand how you feel. My father passed before things were sorted out. He molested me from the time I was three until twelve. I wish I would have told him how much I hated what he did to me and how much I did"nt understand why I still loved him. I think we are brought up to believe we are supposed to love our parents no matter what. Are we wrong?

Thank you. You know, hugs are good medicine, Sunny...better than Prozac I think!

all I can offer is a hug sweety.. Hope as fathers day passes, those good times is all you can think of.