Born In England

I was born in England and have lived there the majority of my life. I did not like living there and have acquired numerous bad experiences and memories there. I used to be a confident open child and was bullied until I became my own polar opposite. I experienced racism. My parents were very poor. I witnessed and suffered many nasty things. One time I felt death, disease and viciousness was all that surrounded me. Some of these have no ties at all to England, but my subconscious has always associated the country with them.

There are a few things I like about England: some of the accents, some foods you cannot get anywhere else, the landscape and nature, the education, some of the buildings...

Though there are also many things I dislike about England (apart from the memories/experiences): chavs, the weather, lack of privacy, people being rather reserved in general...

Every time when I would travel to England, my husband would notice a complete switch in my personality. I would not be my normal cheerful and happy self. I would suddenly become very negative, angry and upset. I did not notice this until it was pointed out.

I went back to visit my family and friends recently (I normally only ever go to visit and not for my own enjoyment) and things were very different. Although I cannot say I love England, I can say I probably would not have as much of a problem as I did previously with living there. I enjoyed seeing everyone again and actually liked exploring the areas which had changed a lot since my last visit. I liked hearing the familiar accents and slang again. I'm glad that, somehow, I have 'forgiven' England for being the country in which I experienced such terrible things and have made my peace with it.

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1 Response Mar 15, 2009

I've heard some negative stories about England but there are such things in every country in this world. At least now you seem to have made some kind of peace with what you endured there and as time goes on it will get better for you. Remember it's not the PLACE that the problem it's the people. A building can't act racist or taunt you or be vicious to you. Hold the people that hurt you accountable and enjoy the beauty of the country itself.