Lost My Boston Terrier In September And Now My Schnauzer Has Cancer

I am a dog mommy. I know the general population, especially the ones with "real" kids don't understand my feelings and that is fine. Losing my Ozzy (boston terrier) in September was very sudden. He was seemingly fine, seemingly healthy. One minute he was playing with his brothers, the next he was having a grand mal seizure. He was gone with in a day. He had a brain tumor. He never stabilized enough for surgery. The loss of him has been the hardest thing I have ever had to fight through. Some days are better than others and the pain comes in waves.

Now its less than 3 months later and my miniature schnauzer Ali has liver cancer. His only symptom was vomiting. That has subsided but he isn't eating. His pathology comes back tomorrow and I don't know how I'm going to get through this. I slept through the entire day. I don't know if its because I'm sick on top of everything else or if I mentally can't function and my body is making me sleep to cope.

I feel so lost, so broken, so empty. Everyone keeps telling me that I have to stay strong and be there for Ali. I am doing the best that I can do at the moment but the pain is unbearable, the fear is all consuming and I feel like I just can't do this. I am not strong enough to survive this battle.

I understand that dogs die. Its life but Ozzy was only 11 and perfectly healthy minus the brain tumor.. Ali is 8. He's still young. until the last few days he was still vibrant. How can I survive this insanity when I still haven't gotten past losing my Ozzy.
ImagineLove ImagineLove
31-35, F
1 Response Dec 3, 2012

My heart goes out to you.
I lost my dear girl doggy to cancer over ten years ago, so I understand the horror the anguish and grief.
I hope you have some support system in your life.