I lost my beloved cay Baxter a week  ago and I'm devastated. He was 10 years old. He seemed to be fine (eating, drinking) except he started having difficulty going to the bathroom. I ended up having to let go of him - Cancer it turns out. I'm an absolute mess, it is just so hard. A few years back I got a divorce and this is far worse than that for me. I just keep running all the guilt and questions and sadness through my mind.

amac123 amac123
31-35, F
4 Responses Feb 28, 2010

I am very sorry for your loss but Baxter is in good hands and will be having a good time while he wwaits for you to join him. I believe once he is all settled in he will make a visit or two. Someday you will catch a movement out of the corner of your eye, hear a scratching sound, that is Baxter checking up on you.<br />
<br />
"Don't be dismayed by good-byes, A farewell is necessary before you can meet again, And meeting again, after moments or lifetimes, is certain for those who are friends

Amethystium - thank you for your kind words.

Thank you all for your comments. It's very comforting to hear from people (I've tried unsuccessfully to find pet loss support groups in my area). Losing Baxter has been the hardest experience for me. I can't stop going over the same torturesome things over & over again.

I'm sorry :( I have lost a couple cats of my own so I know how you feel. Honestly probably the best thing to do is get another cat even tho you're not over Baxter yet, it will give you another cat to focus on and become close with. I have pics of my old cats fr<x>amed on my wall.. theres always things you can do to keep Baxter's memory alive.