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How Do I Change The Way I Think

I love my partner but she does not love me. She says things to me to make me feel insecure . But when I'm insecure I ask her about things I'm conserned about. In stead of her reashoring me she says something to make me feel worse. I feel that I'm going through mental torcher. So I need to change the way I think
Nigel9000 Nigel9000 41-45 5 Responses Jan 8, 2012

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You need to leave that person and look for someone that love and help u with your steem.

Do a search for "Passive Aggressive" behavior and you'll see her traits. Many sites discuss how to either deal with it or how to get away from it. Good luck - this is NOT healthy so educate yourself!!!!

What gave me the courage is the 12 steps. I am a recovering addict and i work the steps and they gave me enough faith in myself and a lil confidence that i could make it without him and that i didn't deserve to be treated that way. I told myself that i am too young to live miserble the rest of my life and that i had wasted too much precious time already. It was hard at first but with the help of God and friends and the program i have been away from my ex for 2 yrs and i am now in a wonderful realtionship that is healthy and respectful. I believe that anyone can get the courage and strength. U just have to have a lil faith in urself.

Thank you. You have given me a better insight into my situation.

I recently ended a seven year relationship from someone who put me through the same grief. I was always told "I'm crazy", "I'm an emotional mess", and my favorite, "I'm sorry you feel that way", which was always said after he would do something truly harsh to hurt my feelings. For me, him telling me constantly for a month straight that he didn't know if he wanted to be with me anymore, was the last straw. I promise you, it isn't you. You don't need to change the way you think.

it sounds like u may need to rethink the realtionship ur in, it sounds abusive. I went threw the same kind of things with my ex husband but after 15 yrs i got the courage to leave

I have to ask, what gave you the courage to finally leave and be done with it? I'm going through the same thing right now with an extremely manipulative ex. I finally left him after seven years, but I still feel as if I am nothing without him.