36 Year Old Man

I pretty much hate everything about myself. I never ask women out because I think I'm way too short, ugly and not successful enough. When I was a kid I was teased a lot for my acne. Even though it cleared up I still hate my worthless face. I went from 190 lbs. to 144lbs from losing my appetite from being lonely and sad.
Pugfan76 Pugfan76
36-40, M
2 Responses Feb 15, 2013

Dear Pugfan76,
You are not too short...I have lived in lots of places and you can easily find really tiny people having fun, enjoying themselves and being extremely happy.
Ugliness is again a thing that depends a lot on the context you are in. For an asian being hairy chest is ugly...for a Iranian its more that ok.
Try to cultivate aspects of you that make you interesting. Read more. See movies. Learn to draw or to paint. Be able to discuss whatever topic. Get some kind of skill that enables you to bring attention to you. Don't take yourself too serious and learn to make fun of yourself.
Becoming more interesting you will be able to attract more people around you.
On success...concentrate yourself on the things that you professionally like and make them you small little obsession. Define what is success for you and if this goal is to far away try to set a small set of goals that will lead to getting to your final goal.
Hope this helps

Thanks for the advice. I've been taking karate for the las 5 years and every time I move up a belt I feel good about myself for a few days. Maybe I'll take up dancing or learn to play an instrument. I got depressed when a woman I liked a lot at work didn't like me back. Caused me to lose 45 in 4 months, lol

Now that you recognize some of the issues that are preventing you from finding happiness, I wonder what you will do to change course? Or are you just comfortable were you are in life now, and have no plans to venture in another direction?

Because i cant handle rejections at this point. The lower your self esteem the more rejections hurt.