Image Issues

I have huge issues with my husband buying mags like picture and saving pics of hot chicks off metacafe. Each time I find something like that I take it as a personal knock to myself and feel like I'm not good enough. My husband says that all blokes look at them and it's nothing to do with me being unatractive. But the girls he looks at never look like me and besides lately (after I made it very clear I needed to be told when I looked good) my husband never came up and told me that I'm hot.  Other people tell me that I'm good looking and that my body's great for having two kids but I still feel like I should be something else - I'm seriously considering a boob job as my boobs have shrunk considerably and are saggy(grose!!) hubby says it doesn't bother him but he's a boobie man and all the women in the pics he looks at have awsome boobs! I spend all my time trying to look better - even sitting in different ways so that he can't see my 'I have too much skin on my belly' rolls. Some days I feel like I'm ugly and others I feel like I'm hot but my husband isn't noticing or doesn't care because there are so many chicks better looking than me out there! I used to beleive that it was seeing hot chicks that made us bad but now I beleive its the reaction that men have to them thats the prob! To me wanking over pics of other women is as bad as sleeping with them especially when I don't think the wanking would've happened if the pics weren't there (is that wierd??). I really want to know how to be happy with what I am as I know I have it pretty easy compared to others with image issues but everytime I think I'm ok I'll find a new pic or something and I go through it all again. (My
mum08 mum08
26-30, F
4 Responses Feb 21, 2007

What your husband is looking at is like reading of five star hotel dining menu. So long as he is not ordering them using the hard earned money, feel that you are the real thing in his plate. It is indeed difficult for the wife when his attention is somewhere else .If he is good in taking care of all other aspects of your life , can you not wait little more to settle down to the served plate from the fantastic menu.

I understand what you are going through.<br />
2Quirky gave some good advice as well as retired mother. Tell him he can have the pictures in bed - and then go to counselling. It is not healthy for him, and it is very hard on you.<br />

*********** is an addiction. If he won't go to counseling, maybe you should.<br />
<br />
I know it is difficult, but don't take it personal. It has very little to do with you.

He's an insentive weiner head. Do what I did! Open the centerfold, pose it on your bed, light a candle & leave it for him to find. Tell him if that's what he wants, that's all he's gonna git in that bed! Ha ha! Works! (really did that when we were newlyweds 17 yrs ago) Seriously, I know guys love looking at that air-brushed BS, but it's plain insensitive to flaunt it in your face. Just tell him you feel sexier (they love THAT sh**) if you can make believe he doesn't want to look at any tarts, & that you wish he'd stop. Or you could just kick his ***.