Ha, Here I Come Self Loathing

i just wish i could appreciate myself a little bit. the depression makes it seem impossible. i just want to drink. i won't ever get a job in a dance company with this low self esteem. i just hate myself so much sometimes. it is a torture i wouldn't wish upon my worst enemy. ever. 

pinkpaintedshirt pinkpaintedshirt
22-25, F
1 Response Mar 5, 2010

The name Pink painted shirt tells me that u wish to paint a picture that u are worthy of love and recognition..... On some lvl u believe u are worthy of such benefits however........Since u r the only one now that can give yourself the permission to love y dont u??? As an adult no one has the power over u anymore, to take this from u, unless u give permission for this to happen.<br />
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When you meet ppl or shake there hand or their say your name i bet you do it with a head half cocked or face gaze to the ground.............. this spells im not worthy... Y???? U need to go back to the situation that u were either put in or put yourself in where u felt u were neither worthy of love or recognition....... U r your worst enemy while u continue this way.........<br />
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By allowing the past to continue to walk in your future you continue to give power to those who robbed u once... Its like leavin your front door open sayin im not home take what u want all over again.... If u want to love and u feel u r worthy..... remember this life isnt a rehersal... y allow someone else to live rent free in your head.?? <br />
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All that courage means is, that no longer to allow past infulences into your life and realise they only have the power u give them and if you dont give it anymore then you can move on... by doin this you will find love again for you..as loving yourself means that you listen to the voice inside withoout fear or criticism from yourself or others, as you are living your truth and only u and only u knows what that is... each an every persons experience is different.....Pp,l friends and family can only give advice.... this doesnt mean you are wrong just means you have the ability to see from another vantage point use this as a tool for your growing and not as a judgement...... as only u are worthy to decide what it means to you............