Moulding People

As I look back over the roller coaster of my life Its hard to believe it all happened to me. I guess each single experience we go through is like a building block to make us the person we become.
So many bad memories started me off on a road to destruction. From a very young age I was abused in many ways by many people in my family. This went on for almost twenty years. In my early teens I saught love by throwing myself at anyone who showed me affection... Im sure you can guess what that means. I started taking drugs at 13 and worked my way through a list a pharmasist would be proud of.
When at age 13 my girlfriends and I got drunk in a park and decided to play in the fountain in our underwear we thought we were invinsible. The police were doing some sort of training in front of the station across the road, and on hearing our girly sqeals decided to investgate. when we saw them coming, our only thought was run and hide!! I dont know where this man came from, but a fifty something yr old biker called for us to follow him down the bush behind the local swimming pool. Needless to say, we did.
He took us further and further and as the cold started to get to my near naked form, my minds fog started to clear. I started to protest that we should go back and he told us the police would be looking for us and we should jst sit and wait with him. I dont know why, but we sat.
It was dark, cold, and I had jst made one of the stupidist mistakes of my life. I tried to give my friend a nudge with my elbow to get her attention I said I thought the cops would be gone. The man then pulled out some powder and tried to convince us to hav some. He told how we wouldnt even think of the cops after that cause we'd feel so good. Thankfully at this my gut instincts kicked into survival mode and I pulled my friend up by her arm with me and while racing back up the hill rambled that we had to go. He was following and trying to change our minds when the police shone their torches on us. The relief I felt as the police were telling me I was one of the most stupid children they had ever met was overwhelming. The man was taken away in hand cuffs and we were told if we ever even saw him on the street to ring the police.
At sixteen I went through a why me phase. Everything that I had gone through in my short life felt like it was sitting on my shoulders along with a million questions that I had no answers for. Suicide was something that I thought about daily. By this time I was wagging school every day and meeting up with a group of misfits. One day I was introduced to a group of 20 or more homeless kids. Their ages ranged from 11- 22. I started hanging with them daily, and as we got to know each other they all started to tell me what occured that made them homeless.
The majority of these KIDS were kicked out because it was too hard for their mother and/or father to be parents. Their stories saddened me, but what made me respect these people more than anyone else Id ever met was that they were the most selfless kind non prejudice people I ever met. One of the 15yr olds bought me flowers one day out of his food money jst to make me smile.
I took one home to my house when no one was home for a shower and food and to wash their clothes. He couldnt look me in the eye when he asked for a bag for his socks. When I asked what was wrong. He told me he hadnt been able to take off his shoes for almost 3 months. his socks were as stiff as cardboard.
These people gave my life more than anyone has ever given me before or since my time with them. I am so grateful for the precious memories they gave me and the life lessons that mean the most.
ONE of the many things they taught me is that we should always be grateful for for everything, even the smallest of smiles. These are what we survive on.
dove80 dove80
31-35, F
May 20, 2012