I Hate Change

Around the age of 11, L showed up. We still don't know why, but it happened. Somehow, she knew what she was without any problem and she was able to keep life "normal" looking. Through the years, we've worked out how to keep a "common memory" as my husband calls it and keep some track of time. We made it through school almost unscathed, only had J and Z show up during college, and finally went to a "therapist" for a few months. I say "therapist" because she had/has no clue about what to do with us. I know she helped Z work through some stuff, but overall I think she made us unwilling to go to someone else.
However, right now, we need to talk to someone...anyone. we never had a huge problem with each other, in fact when S disappeared, we really worked together well. Lately, we don't what's going on. We just got married a couple months ago. it all seemed to be going well, but now I'm not sure. we keep switching...and I'm not sure if another alter is around or not....all i do know is that we are no longer able to control anything. This might sound weird to some, but L or Z has always held control, even if they did battle it out for a while. It's like when S disappeared and we were left without the original.
Nothing has helped that normally does, which is why I'm looking for something, anything else. I need to talk to someone... the fact that I'm battling the stupid computer, which keeps freezing, kinda proves that. We have learned how to keep this hidden, only my husband and two others know, but there is jut too much going on. Marriage, move, looking for a new job, and losing my precious computer to who knows what virus. I just can't handle everything and so my world is collapsing. Anyone have any ideas to help?
sljz sljz
22-25, F
1 Response Aug 2, 2010

i wish i could help. but unfortunately ... i have no ideas and neither does my alter. we are very sorry you are having trouble and we hope you find your answer soon.