A Hard-to-Believe But True Ms Premonition

At age 24, I spent the year working on an MFA in painting while house-sitting for R.E.M.’s drummer in his ante-bellum Georgia mansion. The band was on a world tour, and as part of my job, I also ran in the woods each day with the dogs belonging to the band’s manager. My story—and a book I've written called Seeing in the Dark— begin there.

Throughout my childhood and adult years, I had experienced countless premonitions in dreams and waking life. As a kid, in my wish to be well-grounded and uphold my image as an academic over-achiever, I tried to downplay these experiences. I knew there was some spiritual mechanism at work, and my family and friends had often observed my dreams coming true, but it just seemed like there was something flaky about the whole thing. I tried my best to write-off what I couldn’t explain.

It was with the manager’s dogs one day in the woods that I was forced to deal with my premonitions in a serious way that permanently changed my outlook on life. While running, I heard an unmistakable voice outside of my head tell me that I would develop multiple sclerosis. I was completely shaken about hearing a voice in the woods—it seemed like something out of a crazy dream and not posible in the realm of reality. At the time, I was perfectly healthy, without any symptoms or family history or even any knowledge of the disease. But within nine months, I was diagnosed with MS.

Although my story illuminates the challenge of being faced with a degenerative illness, multiple sclerosis is not the whole focus of my story. Instead, Seeing in the Dark is about recognizing and following one’s spiritual path and accepting the obstacles as integral to the journey.  My story is that of an everyday person facing a string of extraordinary spiritual occurrences, the first of which was validated by the findings of an MRI and a spinal tap.

In a non-linear narrative, Seeing in the Dark weaves together many passages of my life by linking dreams and premonitions that later proved themselves true and led me to the next phase of my experience. The book spans the gamut of being a single young painter on the peripheries of the Athens music scene to expanding my spiritual horizons while trying to establish a career and becoming a wife and mother in Manhattan. The story traces a path through my two-year cognitive impairment and visual disabitlity and onto a path of almost complete wellness.

In the end, my story provides a simple message: there is much more to life than what we see on the surface, and we are able to tap into this other realm for guidance in the everyday.  It hasn't always been easy, and I certainly wasn't happy when I was diagnosed, but personally I view my experience of getting MS as an optimistic affirmation of deeper meaning, proof of the authority some greater force at work in the universe.

Please check out www.seeinginthedark.net  or Seeing in the Dark on Facebook —thank you!
kimgledhill kimgledhill
36-40, F
1 Response Aug 11, 2010

I thoroughly identify with your experience and agree with you. I was only diagnosed this year but have had very, very similar patterns to yours. It's amazing, something so life-changing, but because it affirms and confirms other related and former life-experiences, I almost feel like I finally trust, believe and understand myself now, and will never again question my own instinct, judgement, spirituality or ability. I look forward to reading the book.