One Day Can Change Your Life Forever...

I was in my first semester of college when i was diagnosed with MS. I woke up with my face half fallen, No feeling in my right arm and thought i was dying. I spent an entire day in the emergency room than they sent me home, and said to see my doctor the next day. He had no idea what was wrong and admitted me to the hospital that day. Being 18 years old and not knowing what is going on with your body was the scariest time of my life. The doctors did so many tests, and x-rays, and scans that i was so sick of it. 
After they told me what it was and the worst case of how i could end up i thought my life was over. Who would think that someone who has been an athlete their entire life would end up like this. I was so depressed all i wanted to do was sleep and i pushed away everyone who was close to me. I decided i was going to beat this and continue my athletic goals. 
I am currently 20 years old, a full time student, a college cheerleader, and have a job. I never would have though that 2 years ago i would be able to do all of what i do. I go through so much every day just to seem like a normal person, yet i know that i will never be like everyone else. I will always have to deal with having MS, i will always need more sleep than anything else, and i will always tend to push everyone away when i feel like they do not get it. For the rest of my life i will have to think about my medication regimen before anything else, i will always be the person who feels left out. 
But somehow continuing to cheer through all of this makes me feel more normal, more like i have control over at leas one tiny thing in my life. Irony is that i have to be able to control my body and my will to do so is keeping me as healthy as i think i will ever be. If only people understood how i actually feel every day when i get up, when i go to school, when i do something as simple as running a mile. My life will Never be the same and i have accepted that...but i have not accepted giving up quite yet.
cheerwithms cheerwithms
18-21, F
3 Responses Nov 2, 2011

Your beautifal, and you stay strong, see, I must have had it they say from very early on, and those with rrms seem to fair better when theyve had it longer, strange but true, I think hitting 35-36 is when mine kicked in full gear, but even so, im ok will do well, so many medical options now to slow it down..copaxone works well for me, but eats up my legs...I ran,did aerobics 2 hours a day and lifted moderate weights until I was 35, seems to have kept me stronger-longer,dont ever define yourself by this illness, you take control,and you stay strong! God Bless you.

Thank you so much! I only continue to do it because I don't want to be looked at like I'm not able to do things because of my MS. I want to be able to say I finished something that I started and did it as good as if not better than everyone else even with my MS. It has become a motivator for me to be the best I can 100% of the time.

I second that motion, well said!