Tired Of All Of The Pressure

I'm a 24 year old who wants to have a relationship but is scared of getting into one because I'm sick of the rejection and the hurt. I will admit that I have a lot of good qualities and many of my friends and family keep wondering why I'm still single. I've been overweight my whole life and when I was in high school I worked hard and ended up dropping 80 lbs. Feeling confident and incredibly proud of myself, I worked up the courage to ask my crush out and he rejected me. From then on I thought what was the point of all of the that hard work on losing the weight if I still couldn't attract guys??? Then I realized that I lost the weight for the wrong reasons.

Fast foreword a few years, most of my friends are now in committed relationships and over half of my graduating class has/is getting married and having kids. I'm starting to feel like there's something wrong with me. This past year 2 guys have expressed their interest in me and the best part was that I wasn't even trying, like I usually have to. At the time I wasn't looking for a relationship, so I politely rejected them.

Lately my mom has been mentioning how much she wants grandchildren and I know that she's not trying to pressure me into hurrying up with getting into a relationship. However, I can't help but feel like I'm getting pressured on all sides. I feel like, there's this tiny voice in the back of my mind saying, "Well Well Meg, here we are yet again playing catch up because you couldn't get your crap together...you could've had a relationship with Craig" FYI Craig is a guy that seems nice but there's two reasons why it wouldn't work 1) I'm not attracted to him and 2) we're incompatible

So far I've been getting noticed, respected, and appreciated through my hard work and dedication to my job, friends and family. I feel like if I get into a relationship I'm going to loose too much of myself/identity. I feel like eventually, people aren't to see me as just me. Instead they'll see me as meg AND John Doe.

Am I over-thinking this? IS there something wrong with me?
MegANN87 MegANN87
1 Response Jul 11, 2012

" I feel like eventually, people aren't to see me as just me. Instead they'll see me as meg AND John Doe."<br />
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That sounds a little bit weird to me and I think you need some counseling for that or should drop that type of thinking. It's just plain weird. <br />
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You need more of "me time". You haven't enjoyed life yet. You are 24. Give any of those boys or others a chance and experience what it is to be in a relationship. You'll grow some confidence. Be responsible but have fun. Soon you are going to be 30, then 35, 40 and then you'll regret not enjoying your youth. Protect yourself, start going out with guys and enjoy life. We are on this rock for a very short time. Again, be responsible. Don't lose your job, your family, and the things important in life. You have to be smart about it. And another thing, yes you are over-thinking this. Stop living with the people. While you are miserable, people are enjoying their ticket and your life clock will continue ticking away. Me Time. It's all about you. Stop wasting your time.<br />
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You have a good day.