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Sad.

You know what? I've been single my whole life mainly because of restriction living with extremely strict family who is against dating and lesbianism. These days, I am 22 & living with my dad, who hates gays. I take care of them because my mom left to make a long story short. A lot of girls don't like me as in, most of them have talked about me behind my back and they also are never romantically interested in me either. Because I've been backstabbed by women so much, I can't trust them anymore as a friend. My issue is that, if I can't trust them as friends and they don't like me as lovers, they are completely against me. I also don't trust men by default, but they are the only ones interested in me. I am so sad and hurt. I'm very convinced that I'll never get a girlfriend or even a true lady friend outside of my family. My pain is so sharp and I've been trying to stay out of the depressed zone. It got to the point where I'm looking for relationship characteristics in friendships and then I end up ruining them. I'm a wreck now and really at times don't wish to live. I'm just so tired of being alone and getting my feelings hurt. I just want to be in a happy and successful relationship. An actual real relationship would make me so happy. I don't think it will ever happen. I'm sad. :'(
deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Dec 16, 2012

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If you believe that it wont happen then it wont happen. i am 23 and have never been in a relationship either but i am 100% sure that i will fall in love and get married which is beyond just a simple relationship. In the meantime i jave a lot to focus on, i have a lot of dreams that i want to accomplish which makes being in a romantic relationship not my only dream. Never stop dreaming and dont limit yourself, there are a lot of things in your life that i am sure you want, focus on getting ready for them. fall in love with who you are, take care of you for now and never forget to pray. And when you pray a prayer, start getting ready to receive the answer. Dont just sit and do nothing, for ex: wanting a relationship, you can make sure that you become the best that you can be, physically etc.. And learn to enjoy your life because you are not asking for a guide to lead you but instead someone to be in a relationship with so you will have to "share" your life with that person. Not let the person be the one to guide you. so you definitely need to have a relationship with yourself first and find things that make you excited, so then when you meet that person you can find stuff that you cant wait to share with her. work on being your best self, your sexiest self, your happiest self and dont forget God.