Never Been Asked On One...

Sometimes I feel beyond pathetic...
After being done with high school, I would've thought that things would be different, but no.Junior High and High school were pure hell for me in about every single department. I was a social misfit, I was bullied alot because of my Weight problem, my glasses, my speech impediment, my Learning difficulties and so on. Guys avoided me like I had some contagious and/or Deadly desease, always making me feel and telling me that no one would ever want to be with me, and let alone be seen in public holding hands with me or whatever.

Now at 22 years of age : still nothing... And they say life get better after high school.... Yeah right!

It's still hard for me to think about those past experiences, or to picture myself in a Relationship with someone. This, and I'm fully aware, is the product of years and years of people (mostly guys) telling me that I'll be alone forever. I dont find it suprising that I have a hard time trusting men because of what I went through.
Someone(especially a man!) Can't even give me a compliment without making me feel bad. To this day, I still think that the guy is making fun of me or something like that...

Trust issues is a big thing for me. I don't think I'll ever be able to look at a man without getting flashbacks of what happened to me in high school. If someone did that to me again, I honestly don't know how I would take it...

In spite of that , I'm still optimistic, and I still believe that there are nice guys out there, but the A**holes kind of messed things up for the good ones in my case. I guess I'll stop thinking that way when I meet someone that'll treat me with the respect and the consideration that I know I deserve.
I'm not desperate, depressed about my situation nor am I even envious of the Lucky ladies being asked out on dates, and who had had a taste of romance (At least, not anymore).
I know that all things happen in good time, and that eventually, someone will come along, and give me all the things I've been wanting...



ArtExceteraESQ ArtExceteraESQ
22-25, F
Nov 28, 2012