A Broken Doll

First off, I have 2 gorgeous sisters.  All of our life they get the stares, the curshes, and the relationships.  Here I am.  I'm a little overweight (but not obese) and not foul-looking.  I've heard at least that I'm not bad as far as looks go... yet here I am at 19 with not a crush to my name.  I've never had a relationship (which is ok I'm not looking for one) but the fact that drives me to bitter tears in the dead of night, is that no one has ever even been interested... ever. My sisters have a fair horde of ex's and polite declines, but I the ugly ducking do not seem to be anywhere near to becoming a swan. I fear that I have been birthed into the wrong family somedays.  I have fought with my body and image since age 13 and it tears me apart. Why? What is wrong with me?

ASleepyDreamer ASleepyDreamer
18-21, F
2 Responses Feb 9, 2010

Sometimes when people like someone, they don't show it.<br />
I know, because after I fell in love, when the guy said "Friendship! But sometimes I wonder if you're thinking of something else." I said "No, just friendship. Only ever just friendship." But, in my heart, I was in love.

There's nothing wrong with you. Truly there's not. The thing is, I don't know why you haven't been asked out. I think it has a lot to do with environment. I promise you, depending on my location in this world, I get stronger male attention than other times. The men in my city do not pay any attention to me romantically (but they are polite) but when I join online dating sites, most of the men that pursue me are foreign. And when I've gone to foreign countries I get more attention from men. I think I must be born in the wrong country or something. But it always seems that way with me. Maybe you should try moving away from your family. Maybe not to a new country but to a new area. Sometimes you feel freer when you have to be independent and you have more confidence. <br />
<br />
Worth a shot. And it will help you not focus on your sister so much. You are great in your own right and you don't need to be caught up in what they are doing.