What Is Being Happy

I am  twin and a middle child. Ever since I was little I had to share or fight for someones attention. I had good grades but never once did I get told great job because my other sisters were having a bad time in school so my mom focused on them. Dad favored my older sister and my mom favored my twin sister. If my sisters were having problems I had to help them because I was told it was up to me. I was happy when I became pregnant with my daughter but then my mom stopped talking to me. So that experience was horrible. When I got married I was told it was about time and why did I wait so long. My mom did not want to even walk me down the isle unless her now husband can be there to. So I said yes even though I can't stand him. That was a horrible wedding day for me because of it. I thought my mom would be honered to do this for be because I love her so much. So I truly don't know what happy is because something always forshaddows my experiences in life.
wolveslilb wolveslilb
31-35, F
7 Responses May 17, 2007

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my fist your face gun your head bullet through brain any questions

I am sorry... but I can relate...

Oh I know about favoritism. My brother has always been the favorite. We do not have the same father, and my mother resents me because she hated my dad, who is now passed away. She recently told me that I was the child from hell and she regretted me being born.

sometimes you just cant depend on other people to say good job you have to remeber to pat yourself on the back! im sorry your mother treats you like that which is pretty f**kd up if you ask me! but i ask the same question all the time what is happiness and why cant i be it

It is never easy; it can be really frustrating that someone you hold so dear (parents etc) don't understand you and are ignorant towards you.<br />
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Well, hope that everything will get better :)

It sounds like you have always been the rock in your family and the strong one! Sometimes because of that your accomplishments tend to get ignored. My mom was remarried to a man that I could not stand. When I got married she wanted him to give me away. Instead I had my grandfather do it. I am single now and to this day she never likes anyone I date and continues to be critical. She even judges how I raise my child. I know it is frustrating and I feel the same way in wondering if I have ever really been happy in my life. I have made alot of mistakes and had my face rubbed in it to make matters worse. I just try telling myself that things will get better. I can only hope right?