I Am Almost 19...

...and have never had a boyfriend. I've never even been close to having a boyfriend, no one has ever asked me out. I think that's not because I'm ugly - I actually like myself and the way I look. It's just that I'm extremely shy and have no social life at all, so it's impossible for me to meet new people. I get really nervous when I have to talk with somebody that's not from my family. I also sweat a lot when I'm with people, so I'm alone a lot.
I'm scared that I'll be alone forever because I'm almost 19 and it doesn't seem that things could possibly change in the future, unless I overcome my social anxiety.

forevermichael forevermichael
18-21, F
4 Responses Aug 10, 2010

I wouldn't worry about it at all really.<br />
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I too am very shy and, for want of a better word, socially awkward. It took me 19 years to find my first girlfriend.<br />
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I hate talking to strangers, as many of my stories will make quite clear, yet by working in retail I must talk to new people everyday. It's horrible, I hate working in a shop, but it does wonders for theā€¦ socially static.<br />
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You meet all sorts of people; horrible, spiteful people and nice, kind people. And very occasionally, someone that you spend a little bit longer with, not necessarily in an intimate way, but then, anyway is better than no way.<br />
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I skipped the whole college & Uni thing, where people make most of their long term friends, and went straight into the world of work. Soon after, I moved away from all my old school buddies to a place where I knew nobody at all. The first year was rather difficult. Three years later, apart from my colleagues, I know only one other person, which gives you an idea of just how socially static I am.<br />
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You just have to grit your teeth and do something about it, christ only knows how much I truly hated, and still do hate doing it. I can imagine you are probably feeling fairly similar.

Well, I don't have friends either. I find it impossible to talk to people without blushing or feeling awkward.<br />
Yes, I believe in God, I think he's the only one who loves me and helps me to get through different situations in life.<br />
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Thank you very much for trying to help, I really appreciate it.

Dear Friend, firstly beauty lies within, what the Bible book of proverbs calls beauty is the virtues a woman possesses, in other words a woman with Godly character is what makes her beautiful. <br />
Why feel shy, you are uniquely created by God, you are special, you have strengths which people dont have, you could even have qualities that people would want to emulate. God loves you the way you are.<br />
Try engage in Godly activities that brings you out and exposes you, it would help a great deal. Dont engage in immoral activities just to overcome shyness, its not worth it .<br />
On the issue of boyfriend, a true friend is one that adds value to your life, He's not one that likes you for the fun he derives from you, he loves you the way you are and not what you have . He wants the best for you and also works towards it. Please dont rush, the best is about to come

It shouldn't be too worrisome you've not a had a boyfriend yet. We both are still young and have our lives ahead of us. <br />
It might help you get comfortable with people to wear dark sunglasses?<br />
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http://helpguide.org/mental/social_anxiety_support_symptom_causes_treatment.htm<br />
Have you been to a doctor (psychologist?) To try to find the root of the problem and help it.<br />
He may be able to prescribe something that will help you keep calm. I'm NOT saying go get pills, but they DO help some people.<br />
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I wish I could be there to help you. I bet it would help a lot to have at least one person you could get to know without worry of not liking you. We can talk if you'd like =)