Always Single

This has only recently started to bother me. Generally, I haven't minded being single. I know that being single gives me more freedom and less to worry about because I can focus on my own life without the hassle of trying to negotiate it with someone else's. But now I'm the only one of my close friends who has never had a boyfriend. I've never had a real date. I've never had a first kiss. And having to listen to my friends discuss their boyfriends/ex-boyfriends is making me sick. I take no pleasure in sitting around silently while my friends both discuss their first kisses, and I don't know how long I can really stand listening to my best friend gush about how cute and romantic her boyfriend is. I've said before that I'd rather be alone than with the wrong person, a statement that still holds true, but I really don't want to be alone for my entire life. In fact, I'm really annoyed that I've been alone this long. If only I didn't hate the idea of being alone so much, I would stay single just so I could prevent myself from ever falling into that saccharinely sweet state of mushiness that my friends, especially my best friend, have fallen victim to.
MsStarrShine MsStarrShine
22-25, F
1 Response May 17, 2012

I completely understand how you feel, sometimes it feels like I have no one I can have a decent coversation with because I seem not to have too many common interest with others, especially the ones who laugh at me/make faces for the fact that I never had a boyfriend.