Never Been, Never Will?..
I have never been in a relationship. And I am a complete fool in the matters of the heart.When I have a crush on someone I start acting so stupid that no wonder I can't even make a normal acquantance with the person. If I like someone I can hardly even speak to the person. (Sometimes it happens even when I don't like a person, but I'm afraid they will think I do, so everything goes wrong again) I turn all the moments given to me as a chance into akward moments. The worst thing is that I can't forget any of these moments. I tried already to find something funny about it. Like it happended to me to make a fool of myself several times in front of the person I liked. It works but it hurts later. And I must seem a 13 years old (this is what, I think, my mind really is), but I'm 25!! It is not like I want to have a boyfriend at any cost. I may sound desperate here, maybe subconsiously I'm, but I don't consider myself to be so. And it could be another part of the problem. I often act like I don't care and so the whole thing is doomed to failure from the very beginning. But in reality I care and suffer, but I I just can't help myself .. help!