I Have Never Had a Girlfriend
Its been awhile and still life hasnt changed its shape or form or anything really, but the one thing which has been in a constant in my entire life is the fact that i havent found my girlfriend or i havent had a girlfriend yet. i am still single and being single feels much like this solid fixture of my life. it just seems so constant and i have no idea if i will find someone to love. uni has proven to be no luck, girls say i look much better with the haircut but so what, its not like they will love me for who i am, every girl i know seems to be taken, the single girls are single for a reason, and i keep feeling more negative when i see couples, especially this girl i liked but turned out to be dating some dude. it really sucks because i just dont know whats wrong with me and i am forver finding out why i am still single, even some guy i am smarter and nice than have girlfriends but i dont, i just dont know whats wrong with me. the girl at my job said that i am the only person stopping myself from getting a girl but i dont know how to fix it, why is it so hard to get a girlfriend? i try to be a good person, i try to be well groomed, i am friendly, i help others, but i havent got a girlfriend, i might have girls checking me out, but in the end i dont want to be loved for how i look, i want to be loved for who i am as a whole, why is something simples like that so hard? and i feel as if this gap is closing on me, as i get older this void to getting a girl is closing. and girls are already finding the love of their life while i am missing out, is life really like this? why is love so bad? why do music and tv make it appear wonderful but why dont i see it that way? too many things i just cant work out. sometimes i feel as if i should give up and just be single and do my own thing, but part of me still wants to know why i am not boyfriend material.