I've Never Had It So I Dont Get The Big Deal......

I hear people talking about sex all the time.......and i hate it.

Everyone is doing it, loves it and talks about how great it is. As far back as i remember i used to be a physical person and still am in a way. i have always wanted to be held, touched and loved......but it never happend. I havent been touched in so long that i hate it when people touch me now. I dont like to be touched by anyone b/c i am so used to not (or ever) being touched.

When i finally did have sex, it was was a terrible experience and hated every moment of it. And i have ever since. Mainly b/c the people i was with did not care about me or me being pleasured. I read about sex all the time. I hear all my friends talking about it and how it is such a GREAT experience. I have NEVER felt like that. it was never good for me. i am assuming that it wasnt good b/c the people i was with only cared about them getting off and forget about me. i was never wet enough b/c i they never got me into it. they just wanted to get their **** wet and didnt think about anything other than themselves.

I later came to realize this. I used to wonder why it never felt good to me. I was with one person for six months and not one experience was pleasurable. that's b/c he just dove right in without any consideration on my feelings, just as long as he got what he wanted, my feelings or pleasure didnt count.

No one has ever cared about my feelings when it comes to enjoy sex too. so b/c of that, i refuse to sleep with anyone who isnt concerned about their partner. 8 years later and i still have not found anyone who cares about anyone's feeling but their own.
Alwysblue Alwysblue
36-40, F
1 Response Jul 28, 2010

In Western culture people talk openly about sex. I think it is sort of a "brandishing my sword" kinda thing. In Asian cultures you will be labeled a bad person if you talk about sex. But in Asia people brag about things like their "social status" & "how much their company cares for them"!!! What I've discovered is most often all these big-talk is a balm to cover the shortcomings of their own experiences. Somewhere people feel unsatisfied and insecure...they mislead others into believing what they want others to believe.<br />
Some of my classmates work for XYZ Inc. They brag and look extremely happy. What I've found is XYZ is a totally bogus company...can't understand why they brag.<br />
I think the big talk about sex is to some degree analogous with the above example...I would suggest that you try not to fall in the trap.<br />
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Sex is not an act, but an ex<x>pression of love and other emotions. If you don't have emotional connection with someone how can you expect an ecstatic experience? This is my opinion. If bodily pleasure is only what one is looking for then I think **** sites and vibrators may be all that one may need.